


The Battle Within

by PristinePotato



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Betrayal, Drama & Romance, F/M, Flashbacks, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Visions, Friendship, Knights of Ren - Freeform, M/M, Missions, Multi, Plot Twists, Sharing a Bed, Tags May Change, Training, backstories, spymasters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-30
Updated: 2020-03-19
Packaged: 2021-01-12 20:57:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 35,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21232358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PristinePotato/pseuds/PristinePotato
Summary: Set months after the events of The Last Jedi, the story begins with a meeting between Kylo and Rey who have been cut off from each other since the siege of Crait. After the meeting, they slowly begin to reconnect, causing problems on their opposing sides of the universe.





	1. In the End

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally posted on FF, and is at this time, incomplete. The chapters posted will be revised versions of the ones that have already been posted on FF. I plan to finish the story before The Rise of Skywalker is released!  
(The first chapter is very short and differs from the others as it began as a one-shot.)

Kylo woke with a sudden sense of foreboding. A sense that something happening today could change everything. His brow furrowed as he sat up and began stretching. There had been no problems from the Resistance since Crait months ago.  _ Is Hux up to something again? I swear I'll- _

Before he could dwell further on what could be coming, a knock sounded on his door and he got out of bed to continue another long and tedious day of being Supreme Leader.

* * *

Rey tried to calm herself as she was led through the narrow walkways of the ship. When Poe had contacted her in a panicked voice, she knew she had to abort her mission and return as soon as possible. Rey hadn't slept for two days as she traveled across the galaxy. She had never imagined she would be too late and as she followed Poe with his uncharacteristically slouched posture, a slight longing began in her heart for something she refused to name.

* * *

Kylo had just finished a briefing when he felt a whisper of a something that he hadn't felt in a long time. As he slowly recognized the feeling, he canceled his appointments for the rest of the day and locked himself into his rooms to wait.

* * *

Poe closed the door behind him, leaving Rey alone in the cold room. She hugged herself tightly around the stomach, hoping that if she squeezed tight enough she could keep her emotions contained. It was no use. She was slowly breaking into pieces and losing direction. She didn't know what she was supposed to do, how she was supposed to go on. How could she continue her work with no guidance? She never should have left. If she had stayed she would have had more time. She had lost so many people already, and yet it was never easier.

Rey's thoughts and emotions were spiraling out of control. She felt as if she was going to explode and she didn't know how to stop it and—

* * *

Kylo wondered to himself what had happened as he sat on his bed meditating. Rey had kept him cut off for so long, and he knew that something drastic must have happened for her to have let her guard down.  _ Perhaps one of her absurd, puny, rebellion friends had gotten themselves caught. It would serve them right. _

His belittling of the Resistance kept him occupied as he waited for the inevitable. He knew that a connection was coming and he promised himself he would not give into the weak, unbalanced, sentimental, fool that he always seemed to become around her.

It did not take long for Rey's appearance, and it took even less time for him to break his promises to himself.

* * *

"You look different." Rey stiffened in recognition of the snide voice behind her but did not allow herself to look at him.

"What's changed? It's been months since I last saw you." She could feel Ben's presence like a fire scorching her back, and yet she refused to turn.

* * *

It didn't take long for Kylo to realize that something was terribly wrong. He could feel Rey's bizarre emotions as though they were his own and he felt his chest tighten as he began guessing.

* * *

"Rey." The guilt building up in her chest threatened to overflow when she heard him say her name.

"Something must have happened. You've kept me away for so long," He sounded tentative as he continued, "Did something happen to one of your…friends?"

The tears started falling as she felt his hand on her shoulder. She flinched knowing that he could now see her surroundings, but it was too late.

Rey tried to contain her sobs as she looked down at Leia's still body.

* * *

The air he tried to take in hurt like shards of glass. Kylo felt himself start to shake.  _ Why didn't I feel it? _ Had he been so consumed with himself, so distant from her that he hadn't realized she was gone? His mother lay before him looking as beautiful and dignified and… as still as he'd ever seen her and he hadn't felt a thing.  _ What happe- _

"I should have stayed." Kylo's thoughts cut off as he looked up to see Rey shudder through another sob.

"She wanted me to go. I think she knew. I-I wasn't even here to say goodbye, I was too late." Kylo's hand left her shoulder as she fell to her knees and he lost sight of Leia.

"Why must they always go, Ben? It's just not fair." Rey's face was streaked with tears and Kylo watched her, struggling with a response. He longed to comfort her, to tell her he had the same question. But the words didn't come through his grief and he instead sat down beside her, hoping his presence might be enough.

* * *

Despite the months since she had last seen him, Rey's connection to Ben seemed stronger than ever. She couldn't decide if it was him or the distraction he brought that had calmed her slightly. But regardless, she wiped her arm under her nose, attempting to stop it from running as she watched Ben lower himself to the ground.

He sat against the casket and Rey felt that he did so with an unconscious and childlike hope. In his mind maybe if he couldn't see Leia, then he could go on without coming to terms with her death.

His face seemed contorted and she could feel the confusion of his emotions. Rey felt her heart drop as the realization finally seemed to sink in. Ben's mother had just died.  _ His mother. _ While Rey may have cared for and loved her, Leia had not raised Rey. Leia was not her mother.

A tear began to fall from the corner of Ben's eye as he stared at the floor. Before she knew what she was doing, Rey reached out and wiped it away.

She could see his surprise as Rey lowered her shaking hand from his face. Her face flushed, but before she could turn away from him he took her hand in his.

Now it was Rey's turn to be surprised as Ben's large hand encased her own. She gently squeezed his hand before letting go, shifting around to sit shoulder to shoulder with him. She then reached for his hand and they sat together staring at their intertwined hands as Rey softly said, "I'm so sorry Ben." His grip on her hand tightened and he leaned his head back and stared at the wall.

* * *

In the quiet Kylo focused on the sounds of the ship and Rey's breathing beside him. He marveled at Rey's ability to comfort him. Despite all he had done, and all they had gone through, she managed to put everything aside and be there for him. Kylo felt like an idiot for the way he had been acting as he had waited for Rey, for the way his insecurities seemed to bring out the monster in him.

He could feel Rey moving and turned to see her head drooping. As she slowly laid against his shoulder, he realized that he always wanted Rey to feel this safe with him. He felt her hand loosen around his as she fell asleep and knew that though he may deny it, his attachment to Rey was only growing stronger through their renewed contact.

He wanted to worry for the future, for what could be coming and what could push her further away, but instead, he closed his eyes and fell asleep, missing his mother and dreamed of a different place where life wasn't so complicated.

  
  



	2. Back to Jakku

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll find this chapter is significantly longer than the last.

Kylo woke in his own bed and saw that it was close to midnight. He groaned, knowing he would not be able to go back to sleep now. As he began recounting everything that had happened he practically jumped out of bed and furiously began pacing. Things were not going how they should. He was not acting how he wanted — how he should be acting.

Kylo could feel his anger bubbling like lava beneath the surface and quickly exited his room. He walked as calmly as he could, but he felt as though he might explode any second. He got to the closest training room and could hear people inside despite the late hour.

The doors opened immediately and the officers that had been sparring stood at attention as they recognized him.

"Out."

Not wanting to be caught in the wrath of the Supreme Leader, the officers wasted no time exiting. Once the door closed behind them Kylo headed to a punching bag in the corner and started going at it with a ferocity that would startle anyone not privy to his power. As his knuckles began to split, Kylo slowed his attack. 

An anxiousness in him grew and despite being physically tired he was not completely spent. He sat down in front of the punching bag and closed his eyes. Kylo reached out with the force and detached the bag from the ceiling. He then proceeded to throw it across the room, but before it crashed against the wall he stopped it. 

Over and over he flung and stopped the bag, while his thoughts and emotions slowly started to balance.

* * *

General Hux is in one of many control rooms watching Ren fling a punching bag around through the monitor. Hux is fairly confident that Ren doesn't know he's being surveilled. 

He has a select team that keeps an eye on the Supreme Leader and watches his every move. Hux has been hoping to catch Ren doing something damning, but so far there has been nothing. 

He's been focused on his work and as calm as Hux has ever seen him. He can't even remember the last time Ren threw one of his tantrums. Until yesterday when he suddenly canceled his meetings and locked himself in his room, which regrettably Hux has not managed to get cameras into. 

And then today he storms into a training room, beats the crap out of a punching bag and begins to throw it around without moving a muscle. The small show of power reminds Hux of Ren's deadly nature and a small warning goes off in his head, telling Hux to be extremely cautious as he moves forward. The Supreme Leader is a strong opponent, but he's easily angered and often lets his emotions take over. Hux decides it might be time to put his next phase into place.

Hux stands up and begins putting his gloves back on while Ren re-attaches the bag to the ceiling when without warning Ren's eyes pop open and his head snaps towards the camera.

"Shit." 

A captain sitting at the controls across the room looks up in alarm but, Hux waves him off with a stiff expression. There is nothing he can do but wait to see how the Supreme Leader would react. 

Staring right into the hidden camera in the wall, Ren flicks his hand and the punching bag explodes, right before the screen blacks out.

* * *

Kylo watches sparks shoot out from the camera he crushed. Pieces of it fall to the floor as Kylo thinks,  _ I'll deal with Hux later _ . He gets to his feet and heads back to his rooms to shower.

While he felt a lot calmer, Kylo still had a lot to think about, and Hux was the least of his worries. He needed to find a way back to his old self — the way he used to be before Rey came into the picture. The way he was before he murdered his father, and before his mother died. 

But as he got out of the shower he realized that if there's anything he's learned from his life so far, it's that you can't change the past. All you can do is move forward in the direction you choose. That's the problem Kylo now faced. 

He had no clue what direction he wanted to go.

Kylo was getting dressed when someone knocked on the door.

"What!?" He barked.

"General Hux would like to see you, sir." Kylo rubbed his face in irritation and said, "I'll be there in a minute."  _ What does that imbecilic man want from me now? _

* * *

Hux rubbed his hands against his coat as he and a few of his officers waited for Ren. He knew the Supreme Leader was going to be impatient with him when he arrived, but he hoped his news would distract Ren from his insubordinate behavior for the time being.

About half an hour after Ren blew up the punching bag, Hux received word that one of his bounty hunters had spotted that scavenger girl and wanted to get on the situation immediately. Once Ren arrived, they would contact Netal for a rundown.

Hux was very interested in this meeting as he's been searching for months, but he has barely learned anything about that piece of rebel scum. 

According to scavengers on Jakku, she was a no-one, who got her work done and lived in an abandoned AT-AT. And yet somehow she must have been in contact with the traitor FN-2187, and she traveled with the rebel hero Han Solo. 

She managed to escape from her cell and then proceeded to defeat Ren and escape before Starkiller Base was destroyed. 

Later she then showed up on the Supreme Leader's ship while her rebel friends were being killed, managed to once again overpower Ren and kill the former Supreme Leader and then save her Resistance friends from Crait. Whom they haven't spotted or heard of since. 

In summary, she was a giant frustrating mystery, and now she just shows up on Jakku. Which either means she's being reckless or the rebels are planning something.

Hux heard the door slide open behind him and turned to see the Supreme Leader march in.

"What is it Hux?" Hux refrained from rolling his eyes at Ren's refusal to use his title and proceeded to fill him in on what he knows so far.

* * *

Kylo clenched his teeth together as he struggled to keep his face impassive. His mind moved fast as he tried to make a decision. Should he allow them to take Rey in or should he somehow figure out a way for her to escape and-- _ why would he want her to escape? _

"Who is your contact?"

"Bazine Netal."

"The one who alerted us to the BB-8 unit's presence at Takodana?" Hux nodded sharply, "We are making contact with her now." At his words, a hologram appeared in the middle of the room.

They turned to see Netal before them.

"Supreme Leader, General." She nodded in greeting.

"Netal. What's the situation?" Hux replied.

"I've been stationed in Jakku with some undercover troops for a few months. Thus far there has been no sign of the girl or any clue that she has contacted anyone here. But then today, one of my troops noticed an unmarked ship land. The girl and a man we've been unable to identify exited. We've been tracking them through the market, but at this point, all they've done is look at wares. We are waiting for your orders."

Kylo wanted to groan but refrained as he thought through his options. He first wondered who the unidentified man was as they had all the remaining Resistance members tagged. 

But what he was truly curious about was Rey's presence on Jakku. She had no reason to return, and they couldn't be there for parts as there were thousands of other places they could go.

"Have they purchased anything?" Asked Hux.

"Only some food and water." Replied Netal.

Kylo watched as Hux rubbed his chin and turned to face him.

"What do you want to do Supreme Leader? I suggest we continue to watch her unless she attempts to leave. In that case we would apprehend her and bring her here for questioning." Kylo thought this through and nodded.

"Let's do that. Except I will go to Jakku. She's managed to escape before and we need as much manpower as we can get."

Kylo could tell Hux agreed with this assessment as he turned back to Netal.

"You heard the Supreme Leader. Watch her closely, and wait for our arrival. If she attempts to leave before then, do everything in your power to stop her." Kylo didn't miss the  _ our  _ in Hux's command but did not comment. He couldn't risk raising Hux's suspicions. Especially if he did something stupid. Which he didn't plan on. For now anyway.

Netal signed off and as they prepared to go to Jakku, Kylo only had one thought.  _ What was she thinking? _

* * *

_ What was I thinking? _ Rey asked herself as she attempted to casually browse the market stalls. She had decided to go to Jakku on an emotional whim, and as she struggled to place the people following her, she truly regretted it. 

Poe had been confused and worried about her request, but had allowed her to go. He was in no place to stop her anyways. She brought Carson with her, as she hoped he wouldn't be recognizable. 

He was to get back to the ship if anything happened, but Rey could tell that the people following her — who she guessed were either bounty hunters or Imperial spies — were not trying to capture her. She figured they wanted to see what she was up to, but in all honesty, she had no idea what she was doing.

"What are you looking for?" Rey turned to Carson and struggled with a response. Her excuse for coming was that she needed some parts for her ship, but she wasn't planning on buying anything.

"There's uh, I had some parts in my old hideout I was hoping to grab." Carson nodded trustingly, and responded, "We’re being followed, so I thought we should split up? Maybe you could go to your hideout and I could stay here and keep an eye on things?" 

Rey felt it would be irresponsible to leave Carson by himself, but she also wanted to be alone. And it's not like the choices she had made in getting here have been responsible. She needed to think through what she's done and figure out how she's going to get them out of this mess. But she also needed to keep Carson safe and  _ ah! Why didn't I think this through? _

She nodded slowly, "Ok. I'll go and see if anything is still there and you stay here. But please be careful. Remember what we taught you." Carson nodded seriously and Rey put her hand on his arm.

"We can't lose you, okay?" Carson grinned cheekily and patted her hand.

"I can handle myself. You're the one I'm worried about." Rey laughed and squeezed his arm before turning around.

"Be safe Rey." She noted something in his tone but did not dwell on it as she smiled at him over her shoulder.

"I'm going to test our signal around 900 feet. Be ready." He nodded and she went on her way.

* * *

Kylo, along with Hux, and some assorted troops picked for the mission landed on the outskirts of Jakku.

"Alright. We'll split up. Hux you take the left of the market, I'll take the right. Netal and a few of her crew will search the ship on our cue. Don't engage with the targets unless they engage first. We're stunning only. Keep your comms on, and blend in. Report anything suspicious. It's about a mile to the market. Got it?"

A few of them nodded as they finalized their disguises. They all wore ragged clothes in different variations of tan, brown, and navy. Kylo felt off-kilter in his light-colored clothes but knew that wearing all black would be too noticeable. Especially a place as unpredictable as Jakku. Their loose clothing helped conceal advanced weaponry, while on the outside they carried more common weapons that wouldn't bring as much attention; staffs, small handguns, and knives in their belts.

They began leaving the ship in small groups and pairs at different intervals. Kylo and Hux were among the last to leave and Kylo could feel Hux eyeing him suspiciously.

"Be careful out there." Kylo turned towards him with a raised eyebrow and said, "You too, Hux." And walked out.

Kylo was making his way through the market when he saw Rey talking to someone he assumed was the man they were unable to identify and kept an eye on them he made his way closer. 

The man with Rey was tall and gangly, with short blond hair and hard to miss dimples. Kylo tried to mentally store the man's noticeable characteristics for the future as he stationed himself beside a stall and watched Rey put her hand on the man's arm. He stiffened as he watched them smiling at each other. As Rey turned to go he refused to dwell on what he could only describe as uncharitable thoughts towards the mystery man who was currently smiling at Rey's back.

Carefully watching his surroundings, Kylo nodded towards a hidden trooper a few stalls down. He then started behind Rey, being careful to be on the lookout for quick hiding places. She was making her way towards the emptier edges of the market, and Kylo struggled with how to proceed. She wasn't going towards the shipyard, but if she got further away from the market it would be harder for Kylo to hide.

Making up his mind he continued after her and hoped she wasn't going too far out.

* * *

Rey could feel someone following her but didn't turn around knowing she could handle herself once she got to the AT-AT. 

As she walked, she wished she knew what had happened to her speeder. It was more than likely that someone had taken it apart and sold the valuable pieces. When she built the speeder, she had never imagined that she would have been using it for so long. Almost every time she went out scavenging, or was going to sleep at night she told herself it wasn't going to last. That she was going to see her parents again and everything would change. And she was right. Everything had changed. Just not as she was expecting.

Finally, her old hideout came into view, and Rey pulled her handgun out of its holster as she got closer. Reaching out with her senses she found that there were no life forms inside. 

She got to the massive machine and saw that her makeshift door was already gone. Stepping inside, she detachedly took in her old home. 

Anything useful was missing, but her personal touches were still there. Before she could get too sentimental, she sensed the person following her getting close. 

Looking around, she found a crevice to hide behind and waited.

Whoever was following her was being very careful, and they edged inside with a knife in hand. She could tell it was a man, but couldn't see his face as most of his head was covered with a helmet and cloth. He wasn't close enough to fire at, and she mentally egged him forward. Before he got fully into the small room however, he stopped in front of the wall covered with her tally marks.

* * *

Kylo could tell that Rey was waiting for him inside the AT-AT and decided the only thing to do was to go in. 

As he carefully entered the room, one of the first things he noticed was the dry, shriveled flowers. Somewhere in his mind, he could see Rey carefully tending to them, and he could see them slowly dying once she left. There was some odd symbolism in that somewhere, but once again Kylo refused to think too much of it. 

The next thing that he noticed was the wall. It was covered in thousands of scratches. He felt himself holding his breath as he reached out to trace a scratch in the wall. 

They were in uniform lines, silver under the black paint and they were many. He took his helmet off as he stood before the wall and ran his hands through his hair. Whether in aggravation or despair, he didn't know. He could practically feel the time Rey must have spent scratching these into the wall. The time she must have spent watching them multiply as she still held out hope that someone would return for her.

* * *

It took Rey less than a second to recognize Ben. She couldn’t understand how she hadn’t sensed it was him. 

Seeing him standing before her wall, she oddly felt like crying. She was sure he recognized the marks for what they were, and she slid onto the ground as she continued to silently watch him. 

Rey took a sharp breath as he touched the last scratch before turning to take in more of the room. She felt as if she was in a different world when she realized he wasn't wearing his usual black. He had on tan robes, much like most other men wore here. Something about this moment felt novel to her, and as he turned to look at the rest of the room Rey felt the urge to explain it all to him. To tell him why she had that trinket, what she imagined when she wore that helmet. 

But instead, she quietly observed him, waiting until he eventually noticed her.

* * *

Kylo recognized the pattern of a Rebellion fighter helmet and easily gave into the urge to pick it up. He turned it in his hands, carefully lifting the visor when a flash of a memory startled him and he dropped the helmet as quickly as he had picked it up. Kylo glared at the helmet for a moment longer, as if the helmet itself had burned him and not the memories playing through his head.

There was a sudden onslaught of emotions pulsing from a corner and getting closer he saw Rey sitting in the corner looking up at him, holding a handgun. 

Before either of them could say anything, a loud bang came from outside accompanied by a mumbled curse.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who doesn't love comments?! ;P


	3. Loyalties

Hux tripped over a hidden chunk of the AT-AT and fell hard. He cursed as he felt a small trickle of blood down the back of his neck. His helmet had hit the metal with a loud bang and unfortunately, it had not protected his head very well. He felt a little dizzy as he sat up in the sand and took off his helmet. _ I should have brought someone with me. _ He thought to himself. Hux had been wanting to poke around the supposed home of the scavenger girl without anyone else. He had many questions that needed to be answered, and he was hoping he would find them inside.

Hux felt around the wound on his head and winced. It wasn't too bad, he wouldn't need to be sewn back up but it was going to be quite the bump. He got to his feet and pulled out his blaster as he approached a sort of entrance. 

Stepping into the AT-AT, Hux took in the homely touches, the scratches on the wall and, _ hello there _ . On one side of the room was a computer. He walked forward and tried to turn it on, but it must have been missing its battery. _ Likely some scavenger. _He checked the sides of the computer and found the memory chip still in its bay. 

He carefully removed it and put it in one of many pouches on his belt. 

Hux was about to turn and further inspect the room when his knees threatened to give out. 

He felt sleepy and confused seeing his face reflected on the computer's screen. His eyes began to shutter closed just as he caught a glimpse of what appeared to be the reflection of the scavenger girl and — _ was that Ren? _ Standing behind him. 

Hux lost consciousness and fell to the floor without any time to wonder whether he was having visions. 

* * *

Rey quickly stood and pulled Ben behind the wall with her as someone stepped into the room. They were squished standing shoulder-to shoulder, breathing the same air and Rey puzzled over the peculiar realization that at this moment she and Ben were on the same side.

Their heads were almost touching and Rey tried to stay silent as they watched General Hux try to turn on her old computer. Whispering something she didn't catch, Hux proceeded to remove what she imagined was the computer's memory chip. He turned it over in his hands before tucking it away in some pouch on his belt. Any moment now he would grow bored with the computer and turn to see them. They weren't easily hidden, especially considering the ridiculous amount of space Ben was taking up.

They had to do something, so hardly thinking, Rey stepped forward, and hastily used the force to knock Hux out. His mind was rapidly going blank and watching his reflection on the computer screen, she could see confusion taking over his features. _ If I could see him then he could see me and— _. She whipped around, suddenly realizing her mistake and bumped right into Ben who had stepped out behind her the moment Hux hit the ground.

* * *

Rey wasn't making any sort of effort to move away, so Kylo grabbed her by the arms and pushed her away from him. Her presence had been clouding his mind and if she came any closer he might do something stupid. He needed to focus on the situation at hand. 

"Why are you here?" He asked curtly.

Rey's face reddened as she looked down and answered, "I don't know. I didn't think."

"You're right you didn't think!"

"You don't have to snap at me, Ben! You don't think I'm already beating myself up over this?"

Kylo could feel his blood boiling. It was too much. This whole situation was just too much. 

How can anyone expect him to stay calm when his mother just died and she used to let him wear Luke's old helmet and she used to call him Ben and—.

"My name is not Ben." He muttered, fists clenched. Rey looked at him.

"What?"

"My name is not Ben." He could feel waves of confusion rolling off of Rey but he'd had enough. He knew who he was. Rey was just scavenger scum pretending to be a Jedi! What did she know about anything? He didn't need her! Kylo had barely given her a thought since she rejected him and then she once again just came out of nowhere and was forcing him to question everything and--_ and she thinks she can call me Ben? _

"My name is Kylo Ren. I am the Supreme Leader and you will stop calling me Ben. Ben Solo is dead." Kylo watched Rey stiffen and saw her finger drift to the trigger of her blaster. 

She was clearly struggling with something to say, some way to twist his words or feelings into something they weren't.

"Fine Kylo Ren." She spit out, "If you're so high and mighty then why are you here doing a soldier's work? Why'd you let me knock out your general? And why haven't you captured me?" Now it was Kylo's turn to struggle with something to say, but glaring at her, he came up with nothing. 

"That's what I thought. You don't know what you want! Haven't you ever wondered why you're so unstable?" Kylo flinched at her last word, yet another unwanted memory trying to work its way to the surface.

"I'm going to leave now Your Supremeness. And unless you want the General to know you were here and failed to capture me, you won't follow." Then she just left, never once looking back.

* * *

Rey started stomping her way back to the market when she sensed something. She got closer to the head of the AT-AT as the feeling got stronger. Once again, acting on an impulse she crawled under the neck and found a small hole in the metal. Reaching inside she pulled out a small wooden container that fit in the palm of her hand. She took a moment just to look at the box and gently traced the flower carved into the wood. She didn't have to open it to see what was inside. 

Carefully securing it in a pocket, Rey crawled back out and dusted the sand off her knees. On her way back to the market, she began to make an escape plan.

* * *

**10 Years Ago**

* * *

"Be careful in there. The caves are going down any day now." Rey nodded up at her fellow scavenger who looked worriedly down at her. A few weeks ago she and some other scavengers had come across some small caves under the sand. Inside they found all sorts of precious gems and metals. In the weeks since they had been mining as much as they could and had been making quite the profit. So much so that Rey had extra packets of food and water stored in an AT-AT she was living in.

Yesterday though, five of the main caves collapsed, effectively cutting off their access to most of the other caves. There were two left, but one of them only had a small opening. The scavengers refused to open the hole further in fear of collapsing the rest of the caves. Rey was the only one small enough to get in, so while everyone was gathering from the main cave, she would go in alone and get what she could.

"If anything goes wrong pull this string, but don't yell okay?" Rey nodded as she tied the string around her wrist, and then began to crawl.

"Be careful little sunshine. Those rocks aren't worth your life." Rey smiled back at the old wrinkled scavenger known only as Bessa. She had been around forever and was known as the grandmother of the group. Last year she had seen Rey trying to sell some scraps at the market and immediately took her in. 

Unwillingly, Rey recalled earlier in the day when some of the others had been whispering that Bessa didn't have much time left. Trying to ignore the ache in her stomach, she reassured her, "I'll be fine Bessa."

Rey was in there most of the day. Only leaving when she had to empty her basket or take a water break. As the cave started getting a little darker, Rey felt a tug on her line. She crawled toward the hole and Bessa said, "Daylight is running out. We have to get to the market before it closes. Finish your load." Rey nodded. She picked up where she left off and continued to fill her basket. She was almost done when she saw something white glinting at her. The color wasn't like anything else she had found. She used her shovel to carefully dig it out, and soon she was holding some sort of white crystal in her hand. Without thinking she slipped it into her pouch and finished her task.

Later that night Rey stood with Bessa on the outskirts of the marketplace. Bessa was helping Rey fill the pack on her back with rations. She was telling Rey to be careful and reminding her to keep any extra's locked up. Rey was fidgeting with her belt as she rolled her eyes at Bessa's nightly reminders.

"Yes, Bessa." She said impatiently. Bessa looked down at her sternly.

"You know one day I won't be here to remind you? You need to make it a habit. Got it?" Rey sighed, still fiddling with her belt when her pouch popped open. She suddenly remembered the strange crystal inside and carefully pulled it out. When she held it in her palm she felt an odd tingly sensation.

"Are you even listening to me, child?" Rey looked up guiltily, and on impulse lifted the crystal.

"I wanted to give you this, Bessie. I found it today. I think it's special." Bessa raised an eyebrow at Rey but took the crystal from her outstretched hand. It was unlike anything she had ever seen. Rey and Bessa watched the crystal as it sparkled in the moonlight.

"I should probably go now. Make sure to lock up your rations, Bessa." Rey grinned cheekily up at Bessa and turned to go, leaving Bessa with a glowing crystal in her hand.

Months later, Rey was standing over a fresh grave, tears running down her small face. One of the scavengers came over holding a small pack.

"She wanted you to have these." Rey took the pack with a snotty sniff. Inside she found two boxes and a clay pot, the bigger box containing an assortment of seeds presumably for Rey to plant. 

But the smaller box was special. Rey had been admiring it for some time now. When Bessa noticed Rey tracing the flower on the lid, she told Rey how her father had helped her make it when she was little. Bessa had lived on a different planet when she was younger, though she could never remember what it was called. 

Bessa often told Rey how it was filled with all sorts of trees, plants, and water. The flower they carved into the box was one of Bessa's favorites, called a "daisy". At some point, Bessa's parents made their way to Jakku and they never went back to the green planet.

Bessa told Rey that ever since then she kept her most precious items in the box and when Rey opened the box with fresh tears running down her cheeks, she found the white crystal glinting back at her. Beside the crystal was a note. 

Not wanting to read it, Rey snapped the box shut and whispered a quiet thank you to the scavenger.

"We'll miss her." Rey nodded in agreement and they stood together for a minute, looking at the spot Bessa lay buried in the ground.

"We've been offered a job with some smugglers. So the company will be leaving soon." Despite everything, Rey felt a jolt of excitement when she heard those words. She wanted to see something other than this dry desert.

"You won't be coming with us." Rey looked up in surprise, the small bit of excitement immediately wilting at those words. 

"You're too young. We can't have children afoot."

A familiar feeling was making its way up her throat and Rey felt herself start to shake as she realized she would be alone again. 

Why did no one seem to want her? She tried to hide her fear as she replied, "I wouldn't have gone anyway. I have to wait for my family." Rey could see the doubt on the scavenger's face but ignored it. No one ever believed it when she said they were coming back for her.

Later that night she said goodbye to the group before heading back to her AT-AT. Alone. Once inside she opened the small box again, squinting in the limited lighting. The note said, "Don't forget to lock up your rations little one." Rey burst into tears. She lay back on her bed, holding the box to her chest, and allowed herself one night to cry.

The next morning as she was about to leave for the day, she crawled under the AT-AT's head and found a hole in the neck. Rey pushed the small box inside and never went back.

* * *

**Present**

* * *

Rey stood inside an empty stall watching someone who was trying but failing to blend in. He had the right clothes and weapons but held himself like a soldier. He motioned to someone across the market and through the bustling crowd, Rey noticed a woman with dramatic black eyebrows lounging in a stall. A bounty hunter. Bazine Netal.

During her time with Poe and Leia, she had learned how to recognize bounty hunters. Whenever a new bounty hunter appeared on the galaxy's radar, the Resistance made it their mission to know who they were, and what they're capable of. Seeing as many of them would be hired to hunt the Resistance, it helped to know who to be on the lookout for.

Rey processed this new information then went through her plan one last time before radioing Carson.

"Any minute now you're going to lose your tails. When you do, get back to the ship. Meet me at these coordinates. Any problems?"

"Nope. Did you get what you needed?"

She made a face but replied, "I guess a did. See you soon."

Rey took a deep breath and sprinted out of the stall.

* * *

Carson was at a random stall, holding some sort of metallic ball when, out of the corner of his eye, he saw multiple figures darting towards the opposite side of the market.

_ That girl. _He grinned at what he assumed was the signal and dropped the ball as he took off for the shipyard.

Creeping around the ship next to theirs, Carson took out his blaster in case of trouble. Someone was sitting near the ship, casually polishing a nasty looking sword. Carson kept his eye on her as he walked towards the ship’s entry ramp. 

At his approach, the girl's head shot up and for a split second their eyes met. They pulled their blasters up at the same time, but Carson got a shot in first. His blast hit her in the shoulder, disrupting her shot and Carson managed to get up the ramp, slamming his hand on the switch to close the door. The door was nearly closed, and he made his way to the cockpit, and only when he sat down did he realize that something had grazed his leg. Luckily his leg was still intact and it was just a small wound. 

Reaching for the medical kit embedded in the ship with one hand, he worked on entering the coordinates with the other. He grabbed a quick sealing disinfectant and sprayed his wound, the bubbling blood drying quickly. Satisfied that his leg wasn't going to fall off, he scanned the small ship for any stowaways. 

Once he felt he was clear to go, he started the ship and couldn't help but sighed contently as he felt the ship come to life and leave the ground.

When Rey and Chewie had found him, he was only dreaming of sitting in a ship and now months later he was flying solo. Despite some of the dangerous situations Carson had found himself in since joining the Resistance, he had no regrets. He had a whole new family now, he had a purpose and then there was Rey and—

A sudden loud sound pulled him out of his thoughts and he realized it was the ship blaring in warning. Checking his radar, Carson saw a small fighter had locked in behind him.

"Shoot!" Something hit the ship from behind causing him to almost fall out of his seat.

"I didn't mean shoot me!"

Strapping himself in and cursing simultaneously, Carson checked his radar for the pest following him and flipped in a simple maneuver. Flying upside down and backwards, Carson opened fire with his blasters. The fighter veered to the side and Carson boosted up, then flipped once again. His follower was making their way up towards him, and Carson blasted them to pieces before they could get any closer. His celebration only lasted a second as Rey's voice came scratching in through the radio. 

"Where are you?"

"Ran into some trouble, I'm almost there. What should I be looking for? All I see is sand."

"Just keep going! I can see you. Drop at the coordinates. Put the ship on autopilot then get out."

"Get out? What do you mean? I'm not getting out of the ship! We have to get off this planet!"

"Calm down! I have a plan, you just have to listen to me."

_ I guess she usually knows what she's doing. Who am I to question her? But where is she? There's nothing on my radar and- _

Looking down he saw Rey keeping pace with him on a speeder.

* * *

She just knew Plutt would have kept her speeder. He had always been the grudge-holding type. Never could let anything go. He probably figured that if she ever returned she would look for the speeder she built. And he was right.

Rey grinned as she shifted gears and sped up. She never used to go this fast. Everything she collected weighed down the speeder, and even when she had a light load she didn't want to push the engine. She couldn't risk something being damaged.

Now that wasn't the case, and she shifted gears one last time to pull ahead of the ship. Carson landed the ship and ran off the ramp. He got off just in time, the ramp retracting quickly as the ship left the atmosphere, heading to some obscure location on autopilot. Rey waited on her speeder, foot tapping impatiently as Carson made his way over. 

"What are we going to do now?" Carson asked loudly over the roar of the speeder. 

"We're going back to Niima Outpost. Get on." He looked exasperated but obeyed. As he climbed on behind her, put his arms around her waist, Rey could have sworn she heard him mutter, "Finn was right."

They encountered no one on their way back to the outpost which had Rey slightly worried, but she had a plan and she was going to stick to it. Hoods secured around their faces, they went straight back to the shipyard. Rey stopped the speeder and they got off, unhooking their blasters.

"Just follow me. If we encounter anyone, shoot. But you know, act casual. Like we own the ship."

"What do you mean _ own _the ship?" Rey didn't reply but Carson got his answer anyway as Rey started towards a newer ship on the outskirts of the yard. The Empire may have thought it wouldn't be noticeable, but among the junky ships it stood out.

"Rey, what are you thinking?"

"Shut up Carson!" Rey had no time to deal with his questions. Generally, he was pretty easygoing and flexible, but he always had to know what was happening. Normally Rey could appreciate that, but at this moment she had no patience for him.

Rey reached out around the seemingly empty ship and sensed only one life form. _ Once I get close enough I can take them out. _ Rey had been working on this ability, and at this point, she could take someone out from fifty feet away.

Once she was within range, Rey closed her eyes and pictured the life form sleeping. She could feel them go unconscious and opened her eyes. It got easier every time. 

"We're good. But keep your wits about you. We're not out yet." Carson nodded, and they cautiously got closer to the ship's door.

* * *

Kylo had a short debate with himself as he watched Hux's unconscious body. He could just kill him now. But that would cause a lot of chaos, and Kylo didn't need that at the moment. Making sure Hux wasn't going to wake up anytime soon, Kylo pulled a dry and brittle flower out of a pot and shoved it in his pocket. Like most disconcerting matters regarding Rey, he didn't dwell on it as he walked out of the AT-AT into the hot sun.

Niima Outpost's main market was in sight and Kylo could feel his pale skin burning. It had been quite some time since he'd been in direct sunlight and though it felt good, he didn't need to deal with the indignity of having a sunburnt face. He reached to for the scarf and helmet that should have been hanging around his neck when he realized he left it back in the AT-AT. _ With Hux. Shi- _

Before he could finish that thought he saw Netal running towards him.

"We have a problem, sir." In general, Kylo felt annoyed by this useless statement. Often times when someone who was supposed to be keeping a low profile was running at you with blood running down their forehead, you could assume there was a problem.

"Where should I be heading and what happened?" She fell into step beside him.

"Back to the shipyard." They started through the market and Netal began to explain.

"I was at my station when I saw the scavenger begin tearing through the market. Naturally, this was suspicious and I gave the signal to chase after her. We followed her to the cleaning section of the market that Unkar Plutt is in charge of. We had her surrounded when Plutt recognized her and started screaming and pulled a blaster on her. This caused chaos as many scavengers took the opportunity to begin stealing rations and shooting anyone they wanted. In the midst of all this, the girl somehow managed to steal a speeder from Plutt's lot and took off."

Kylo was admittedly impressed but pushed the feeling down. He had no time for any of that nonsense.

"What about the unidentified? Surely someone got to him?" Netal fiddled with her infamous Rishi eel-ink-covered fingers. _ Really? _

"There was a miscommunication. When the bomb went off at Plutt's, the two soldiers tailing him got confused and ran towards the explosion-." Kylo cut her off before she could continue, "Explosion? Bomb? Might I remind you this was supposed to be a covert operation?" Netal had the decency to look just a tad ashamed.

"Yes, sir. This was sloppy work. Forgive me." He grunted.

"It's insignificant at this point. So the girl and the unidentified are separated?" She nodded.

"And is it too much to hope that you managed to get a tracker on the ship?" She nodded once more, though looked slightly miffed at this question. 

"So what are we doing now?"

"We're going back to the ship, sir. We lost one soldier in the explosion, and General Hux hasn't checked in. The plan is to see where the ship goes. We figured that they would meet up at some point."

Kylo nodded, "Let's get on it then." They ceased to speak and walked faster through the hot, crowded market. Netal communicated with the others and as the shipyard loomed closer and reported, "They are a little ways behind us. General Hux still hasn't checked in."

They were entering the shipyard and Kylo could spot their ship at the end. He winced as he realized how it stood out against the others, but it was too late to worry about that now.

"Someone come get me!" Kylo and Netal both looked at their radios in surprise as Hux's sniveling voice came crackling through.

Before Netal could say anything, Kylo commanded, "Take some people and go find him. Send the others my way. We'll meet you at his coordinates." Netal nodded reluctantly, and Kylo had a feeling it was only because she didn't want to deal with that rat of a man. He didn't blame her. 

She turned back the way they came, and Kylo started passing ship after ship on his way to theirs. The closer he got, the more he felt that something wasn't right. He finally passed the last ship and pulled out his blaster, wishing for his saber. 

Two hooded figures were dragging an unconscious body off the ship and Kylo raised his blaster to shoot. But just before he pulled the trigger he recognized Rey. 

* * *

Carson turned around just in time to see a man raise his gun. He yanked a startled Rey to the ground and pulled his gun. The other man seemed to hesitate for a moment, but Carson wasn't taking any chances. Aiming, he pulled the trigger while holding out a hand to help Rey up.

"We've got to go Rey." She didn't respond and Carson looked back up to see his blast frozen in mid-air. His eyes got bigger as he looked closer and recognized… _ Was that Kylo Ren? _

"We've really got to go, Rey." Rey nodded and got up. They got into the ship and quickly closed the door to block Kylo from advancing. Hurrying to the cockpit, Rey started directing Carson, whose mind was still on the blast that should have hit Kylo square in the chest.

They took off with no other problems, but as Rey explained the rest of her plan, he couldn't help but recall the odd sensation he had felt standing between her and Kylo. It had almost felt like he was interrupting some sort of connection. Which obviously made no sense.

What he had failed to notice in all the commotion was Kylo's shocked face as the blast froze inches from him.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any thoughts?   
;))))


	4. Questions

Hux stood next to Netal, watching the First Order ship arrive in the shipyard. He couldn't help but look over at Ren who stood waiting between two soldiers. Probably sensing the suspicion in Hux's gaze, Ren locked eyes with him. For a moment Hux dared to glare back, his face hardened in defiance and distrust.

Then he felt his throat constricting and whipped his head back towards the ship as his short challenge came to an end. Ren may be able to keep Hux from showing any outward signs of misgivings, but he couldn't stop the thoughts rolling in Hux's head. 

There was no denying Hux had always been against Ren and his unnatural powers. In Hux's small mind, it had always seemed unfair that he was forced to deal with this volatile man. Kylo Ren would be no one if it weren't for his abilities.

_ Something is different this time. I'm not making this stuff up. _ It wasn't just Hux's fixed dislike talking. He had no idea what Ren was up to, whether it had anything to do with the girl or Luke Skywalker or the murder of Snoke. But it was something. And as Hux fingered the memory chip taken from the scavenger's computer, he knew it was time to act.

* * *

Rey caught herself falling asleep and finally had to admit that she needed to go to bed. She was generally alert during Poe's debriefings, but tonight she was too tired and distracted to pay attention. She knew that if there was something that needed her attention right away he would have told her personally, and so she quietly got up. Poe looked worried as she slipped out, but continued his report when she waved him off.

Over the last months, Rey had gotten to know Poe pretty well, and he had quickly become one of her favorite people. She had no idea what having a brother was like, but sometimes she liked to pretend Poe was her brother. Of course, she would never admit this to anyone—not even Finn who she often confided in. He was a brilliant leader, brave, gave great advice and had enough flaws to be approachable. Beyond that, it was just nice to have someone to look up to.

Maz had allowed them to stay in one of her holdings for Leia's funeral, but as Poe had mentioned at the beginning of his meeting, it was time to get things moving again. Rey had two days to eat, sleep, and plan, before she went out again. She didn't know the exact details of her next search, but she was excited because Chewie would be joining her this time. It had been a while since she had been on a mission with him, and she was looking forward to it.

Rey was almost to her room when she heard quick footsteps behind her. She turned to see Carson jogging to catch up with her. She fought a tired smile as he got closer. There was something adorable about the awkward way he ran. Throughout her life, Rey has found that tall people are either graceful or just downright clumsy. Unfortunately, Carson was the latter, but his good looks and charming demeanor easily compensated.

"Are you doing okay?" Carson asked as he finally caught up with her. She smiled up at him, "I'm good, just tired." He nodded, and Rey could tell he wanted to say more, but he probably knew she wouldn't tell him what he wanted to hear.

She started walking again and he fell into step beside her.

"I'm going to miss going on missions with you. Finn can be a lot of fun, but when he and Rose are apart he turns into quite the party pooper." Rey grinned at this. She agreed entirely and knew that Rose was the same way.

After their first mission together, Poe usually paired up Finn and Rose, and as the months went by they became much closer. Occasionally, there would be missions where they had to go with other people, and Rey herself has had the pleasure of working with Rose quite a few times. She was completely adorable, and Rey enjoyed their time together immensely. But she was also glad when Rose and Finn were back together again. Seeing them happy made Rey happy, but also made her want to shelter Finn and Rose from everything she could. She didn't want them to suffer. She wouldn't be able to bear it.

"You'll have a great time." Rey assured Carson, "Plus I know Finn loves his time with you. He actually considers you as one of his closest friends."

"He's one of my best friends as well, but so are you. I just really wish we had more time together." Rey had to keep herself from wincing. She loved Carson, she really did, but sometimes she worried that she didn't love him in the way he wanted.

She didn't know how to respond, so instead she changed the subject.

"Are you excited for lessons tomorrow?" Carson looked a little dejected at her sudden turn in conversation but responded with a simple, "Of course."

"Great, could you remind everyone at dinner? I don't want anyone forgetting." He nodded as they arrived in front of her room. While Rey was practically dead on her feet, Carson couldn't seem to stand still, bouncing on the balls of his feet as if he was trying to work up the courage to say something. Rey didn't have the energy to deal with him at the moment. 

"Well good night, Carson. I'll see you tomorrow morning." She didn't look at him as she unlocked her door. She started inside but then Carson grabbed her hand.

"Rey, I just-" 

Rey took a deep breath before gently easing her hand from his grip. She looked at him carefully, face as impassive as possible as she said, "I'm tired, Carson. I'll see you tomorrow morning. Okay?" Then she closed the door between them.

* * *

One of Rey's new favorite things was taking showers, and she often did so twice a day. Because she could. But Carson's hurt face kept popping into her mind and she couldn't enjoy it the way she normally did.

As she lay in bed after her nightly meditation she struggled to sleep. She tossed and turned as her mind did the same. Finn had joked that Carson liked her and she had laughed it off. But now she was starting to think he was right. And if he was she didn't like it. She didn't feel that way about him, but she didn't want to hurt him. She wished Leia was still here. She would have given Rey the best advice. She would have helped Rey and she would have felt better and she would have been able to fall asleep.

But she wasn't here. And Rey was laying in bed missing her and feeling lonely despite all the people who loved her. It felt as though she was incomplete. And she didn't know how to fix that.

It came without warning, as it often did. And before she could prepare herself, Rey felt his presence.

Her room was completely dark and yet as she rolled onto her side, there was a brightness emanating from him that hurt her eyes. He too was laying on his side, he must have been in bed as well. The whole setting gave Rey a strange intimate feeling. As though they were sleeping in the same bed.

They spoke at the same time.

"Is your light on?"

"You've gotten stronger."

Before Rey could say anything else he chuckled. He chuckled and it was low and crackly and Rey could feel it everywhere. Her face heated and her toes curled and she felt the urge to wrap her arms around him and shove her face into his chest.

The instinct startled her so badly that she choked on the air they were sharing and shoved her face into her pillow in lieu of his chest because,  _ great stars _ , his chest.  _ This is Ben. No, Kylo Ren. What is wrong with me? _

* * *

Kylo had no idea what was wrong with him. He couldn't explain why he found the moment humorous or why he allowed himself to laugh or why something seemed to loosen in his chest as he watched Rey's dark silhouette squirming around.

Rey made a weird noise before moving again.

"Are you okay?" For a moment she didn't respond and Kylo contemplated reaching for her mind.

"I'm fine. You're just uh… really bright. I mean your lights must be on. That's why I asked, and mine are off and it's hard to look at you-I mean it's not hard to look at you it's easy I just-" She stopped talking just as suddenly as she started.

She was mumbling something to herself before she finally asked, "Could you just turn off your lights?" Kylo complied instantly, clapping his hands three times and his room went dark.

It was silent for a moment and Kylo could hear his heart beating loudly. He squinted but it was too hard to see Rey. He sensed her more than he saw her. 

The mood in the room was odd, almost tense, especially in light of the day's events. Clearly they both had a lot on their minds and had no idea where they stood with one another. 

"So um, what did you say earlier?"

"That you've gotten stronger. You stopped that blast from hitting me. Which I'm still struggling to understand." She didn't say anything so he went on.

"I don't know why your power always surprises me. Snoke did say that we are equals in power. Maybe I was just surprised that a Jedi saved me. Or-" She cut him off abruptly, "I'm not a Jedi." Kylo felt stunned for a second. Maybe he heard her wrong.

"What did you say?"

"I said I'm not a Jedi." Kylo couldn't remember the last time he had felt this confused.

"You, Rey, are not… a Jedi? What are you talking about? How is that even possible?"

"I'm just not. All my life I've heard wonderful stories of the Jedi and of Luke Skywalker. But Ben, I have his ancient texts. I've read them and I just don't agree with them. Their standards and ideas are not only flawed, but they're as dated as the books themselves, and I have no intention of following or implementing them." Kylo was trying very hard to pay attention, but his mind was racing, what? He tried to voice some of his thoughts, though he barely knew what he was saying. 

"Rey, I don't think that's something you can choose. It's something that just is. If you're good, you're a Jedi. If you're evil you can't be a Jedi."  _ Right?  _

"That's not how I see it, Ben. And I don't believe that's how it works. Everyone has good and evil and conflict in them. That's normal! It's just a label." Kylo shook his head. She wasn't making any sense.

"What makes you think I'm a Jedi?"

"You're good Rey. You're light." She shifted around as if she didn't like his answer.

"But I'm not. I've been in the darkness Ben, it's as much a part of me as the light is. And I think that's where the balance is." Rey sat up quickly as she spoke, hands moving about as if her feelings on the subject were trying to burst out of her skin. 

Her passion at the moment was extremely compelling, but Kylo still couldn't believe what he was hearing. 

"I'm afraid you've lost me."

"The balance in the Force. The light and dark. I don't think it means people on either side. I don't think it's some great battle that people should die for. I think it's personal. And I think that we should be finding peace within ourselves. Not waging war across the galaxy just because of some ancient nonsense."

"So you're saying that the Jedi are wrong?"

"If you want to put it that way then yes. But I don't think that there is an exact right or wrong here. I don't think that we should be labeled. Because then there are certain expectations of who we are and what we should be doing. Is this making any sense?"

Kylo didn't really want to admit that she had him confused, but he wanted to hear more.

"It makes a little sense. But maybe you could just simplify it. For now."

"I guess it just comes down to having more of a choice. I think that we shouldn't have to label ourselves as light and dark. Our connection to the force doesn't determine what we believe in."

That idea appealed a little too much to Kylo and he didn't want to think about why. Rey lay back down, burrowing under her blankets.

They were both silent again, lost in their own thoughts. Kylo was trying to think of something to say when Rey spoke.

"I don't know why I did it. I just didn't want you to get hurt."

"Did what?"

"Stopped the blast. I was so mad at you but I still protected you. I can't understand it. And you know what else I don't understand?" She sat up suddenly and Kylo could tell she was getting worked up, but he didn't stop her.

"I don't get you, Ben. Or Kylo. God! One minute you're my friend and the next you're not and I never know which person I'm going to be talking to! You're like this stupidly annoying paradox that doesn't make any sense!" Kylo had no helpful response to that, so instead, he went with the obvious.

"That was a little redundant." She sputtered and then snorted. Which made Kylo grin, he spent all his time with stoic officials. He couldn't remember the last time he'd heard someone snort and somehow it just made sense for her to be the snorting type. She laid back down and turned to face him again. The lightness that had been there for a moment disappeared.

"I'm just so tired Ben. I wish I could knock myself out and not just other people."

"Why can't you fall asleep?" She didn't answer and so Kylo did what he was thinking of before. He carefully reached towards her mind.

When looking through someone's mind, it's generally easier to find the things that distress them. Those thoughts are usually at the forefront of their consciousness and they tend to be the most telling.

The first and only thing Kylo gets to see is the image of that man—the one who shot him on Jakku—holding Rey's hand. He reached for more but was quickly shut out.

"Who is he, Rey? Has he hurt you?" She scoffs at that.

"It's more like I'm hurting him." Kylo could tell she doesn't want to elaborate.

"I can't believe you just did that." Kylo shrugged but realized she probably hadn't seen it.

"I wanted to see what you were worried about."

"That's not fair." Kylo was about to make some sort of retort when he felt her reach into his mind. He was ready and only allowed her one thing before shutting her out.

* * *

Rey's attempt into Ben's mind wasn't much use. He was locked up tight. She was about to give up when he let her see something small. It was his memory of what he had seen in her mind, but it was tinged with— _ jealousy? _ Rey knew he had shared that with her on purpose and so she said nothing. She just wanted to go to sleep. But she didn't want him to leave.

She tried thinking about anything else and stared at the ceiling as hard as she could. She didn't know what he wanted from her, but she could feel him looking at her. And she refused to look back because Rey didn't know what she wanted from him.

And now she was back where she had started. Except she was thinking about a different man and for a different reason. And all she had wanted to do was go to sleep.

Then she felt Ben reach out and touch her hair. It made her feel oddly breathless. But in a good way. A really good way.

"It's wet." Rey nodded. She suddenly felt lighter in a way she couldn't properly describe. In the very back of her mind some warning went off, telling her that Ben might be responsible, but she refused to listen and instead gave into the feeling. 

"I took a shower. I love showers."

"Tell me why." His voice was quieter now. He had shifted closer and was gently combing his fingers through her hair. Rey swallowed. Hard.

"There was never enough water to shower. And now there is and it's almost magical. I don't have to be dirty all the time." Rey had no idea what was happening but her eyelids were drooping and she was getting sleepier.

"Tell me what else you love Rey." He was running his fingers over her arm now. It felt like he was writing something but she didn't know what. It was giving her goosebumps. She wanted him to stop but she didn't want him to stop, so she told him what else she loved.

"I love the rain now. I love that it gets gray and cloudy. I love that the clouds try to hold it in as long as they can. It's like they don't want to share the water. I wouldn't either. And then it rains, and everything is green and it's not dry and…" She didn't know what she was saying anymore. She finally turned her head to look at him. Except he was closer than she expected. He was propped up on one arm and he was looking down at her and she felt like she could look at him for hours. He muttered something so quietly she couldn't even begin to make it out. She started to say something but he gently shushed her.

"Go to sleep now Rey." She was going to. But first, she scooted closer, wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest. She could feel his shock in the stiff way he held himself. But slowly he relaxed. He laid back and wrapped his arms around her. And then she was falling asleep.

* * *

She was in-between conscious and unconscious when they were disconnecting. She could have sworn she heard him whisper that he would make it rain for her. That he would do anything for her.

She might have whispered for him to come back.

It might have been a dream.

She fell back asleep.

* * *

Carson stood outside Rey's door, one hand holding a tray of food, his other about to knock. But then he heard Rey asking for someone called Ben to come back. She sounded desperate.

So instead he left the tray in front of her door and walked back to his room, hands in his pockets and shoulders slumped.

* * *

At breakfast the next morning he sat with Finn and Poe. Rey still wasn't up which was odd because she was usually one of the first people here.

Finn and Poe were talking about some new starfighter designs they had acquired when he interrupted them.

"Do you guys know anyone named Ben?" Poe pursed his lips in thought while Finn's face remained blank.

"I knew of one a long time ago. But oddly enough that's the only Ben I can think of." He nodded at Poe's answer and looked at Finn expectantly.

"I don't either man, sorry. Up until now the only people I knew had numbers for names. Are you looking for someone?" Carson debated over how much he wanted to reveal. Moving his food around with his fork he said, "I just heard Rey mention someone named Ben and I was curious." He could tell Finn and Poe were exchanging looks but didn't look up. They both knew he was more jealous than curious, but he didn't say anything and neither did they.

For a minute they were quiet as the others around them chatted away.

"Well, you know what's funny? I always thought Ben was such a common name but I can only think of one person named Ben."

Carson and Finn looked at Poe expectantly. He laughed a little.

"It just seems so weird to me. But Kylo Ren used to be called Ben." Finn must have known this already as he didn't seem surprised. He chuckled a little along with Poe and they continued their meals, probably not realizing that Carson had put down his fork and was feeling even more bothered. He interrupted them again.

"How did you know that Poe?"

"Know what?"

"That he used to be called Ben?" Finn and Poe both quieted and he could tell there was something they weren't telling him. So he waited.

"Well, it's not talked about a lot. But most Resistance members know, or at least find out. You really don't know?" Carson was feeling a little impatient now. He parroted Poe's earlier words.

"Know what?" Poe didn't say anything, so Finn responded, "That Kylo Ren is Han and Leia's son?"

Carson scoffed at that.

"No really guys, what is it?" The air around them was getting tense and he was starting to feel uncomfortable as they both watched him.

"You're serious? That—that monster is their son? Isn't he the one who killed Han Solo? What kind of person would do that? How did any of this happen?" He had so many questions.

"No one knows exactly what happened. But the short version is that Ben—or Kylo, was sent to train with Luke when he was younger. To become a Jedi. Something happened during his time with Luke. Next thing we knew, the new Jedi temple was burned to the ground and Luke disappeared. Kylo allied with the First Order, and he's been our enemy ever since."

"Wow. I had no idea." He pushed his plate away. Something about what he was going to ask next made him want to puke.

"So... Has Rey ever met him?"

"Yeah. He captured her a little bit before we blew up Star Killer Base. They thought she could lead them to Luke or something. That's why she was there. Han, Chewie and I were there to rescue her. She had already managed to get out. Then he killed Han." Finn seemed hesitant to continue but kept going.

"This part isn't really common knowledge, but she fought him. I don't know exactly what happened because I was knocked out. But one minute we were facing him and the next I woke up from a coma." Carson silently took this in.

"Well, this is getting a little too solemn for me!" Finn commented cheerily. "Let's move on. Anyone? New gossip?"

"No, but Finn, do you remember me telling you about the time the First Order captured me?" Finn nodded, "Of course." Carson hadn't heard, so he waited eagerly to hear what Poe had to say. He, however, didn’t seem inclined to retell the entire story, instead recounting one specific memory.

"Well remember how I shot him, but then he stopped the blast in midair?!"

"Hey! I've seen him do that too! I would have been impressed if I wasn't so worried about getting out of there."

"Wait, how have you seen him do that?" Poe seemed confused. But Carson was too so he continued, "When we were on Jakku. Rey and I were stealing their ship and I shot him but he stopped the blast, and we got away." Poe's brow furrowed. Slowly he said, "Rey never mentioned Ren being on Jakku. She only said Bazine Netal and some First Order soldiers gave you some trouble." They were looking at each other with bewildered expressions.

"So what you're telling me, Carson, is that you two ran into Kylo Ren on Jakku, escaped and for some reason I'm just now hearing about it?" Carson nodded hesitantly, "Apparently so, although I have no idea why she didn't mention it. Maybe she just didn't think it was important." Poe looked dubious, and Carson didn't blame him. He was feeling a little dubious himself.

Before they could say anything else, Finn nodded in the direction of Rey who had just walked in. They watched her as she got her food and started making her way over.

"Just let me handle this, she'll explain it." Finn and Carson nodded and went back to eating as Rey sat down.

"Rey! Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, really well. I kind of overslept." For some reason her face reddened with her response. Finn and Carson exchanged looks as Poe continued.

"Well, Carson was just telling us about how you guys ran into Kylo Ren on Jakku. I can't believe you didn't tell me!" Rey stopped stuffing her face with food for a moment and looked up at Poe.

"Oh yeah, well I didn't think it was a big deal or anything." Poe was looking at her like she was speaking Bothese. 

"It definitely was. He only goes on missions if he wants to." His words were slow as if speaking to a child. Rey stared back at him, a lack of emotion on her face. 

"Well, I didn't know that. I've only run into the First Order a couple of times and he was usually with them. But I'll tell you if I ever run into him again okay?" Poe nodded and was about to say something else when Rey suddenly stood up.

"Chewie's back! I'm going to go say hello. Are you guys coming?" They all shook their heads. Rey had been sleeping when he had shown up, so they had already greeted him.

As she walked away, Poe said, "Well that clears everything up. What was I saying before?" Carson felt like everything was as clear as mud.

He once again picked at his food as Poe continued. "So Kylo Ren can stop blasts in mid-air right? Well, Rey can too!" Finn smacked the table, "No way! That's so cool! How'd she figure that out?"

"She told me it happened on Jakku. She didn't even have to think about it!" Finn looked impressed as he groaned into his food, "She's so lucky. I wish I had the Force!" Carson couldn't stand this. He shot out of his seat and left his friends looking confused, to go find Rey. Something was going on and he wanted answers.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I'm wiggling my eyebrows at you, you just can't see me.)


	5. Tainted

Carson took a deep breath as he tried to put everything together, but he could tell he was missing something. His frustration was getting out of hand. He needed to get better control of himself.

Carson's training for the mission came to mind, and he let himself revisit it to focus himself.

"It is imperative that you align your thoughts and emotions with your actions. A slight difference could ruin the mission. You will become the person they believe you to be, and you will succeed." Carson and his partner had nodded then, anxious but ready to finally take action.

Knowing answers were coming soon, he allowed this memory to take over the decisions he would soon have to make. It was time to confront Rey.

* * *

Finn and Rose were taking a walk when they came across Rey giving her lessons in a small clearing. Rose laughed as she noticed none of them were wearing shoes. She already knew Rey must have been the initiator, as she took the opportunity to go barefoot in any grass she could find. Rose didn't have the same urge, but she hadn't grown up in a desert, so she couldn't fully appreciate the feeling of grass beneath her bare feet. The group of recruits suddenly divided as Rey started passing something out.

Over the past months, members of the Resistance had been going on recruitment missions. Some were tracking down old allies, hoping to rekindle former relationships. Another group searched for small rebellions and attempted to fold them into the Resistance's ranks. And a very small group--led by Rey--was searching for force-sensitive Resistance sympathizers.

Due to this, the Resistance was slowly rebuilding itself. Since losing most of its original members, the chain of command was still shaky. 

Before she passed away, Leia had named Poe her predecessor. However, there was a rumor that she had been making plans for a new form of leadership, though no one was privy to the details. All anyone knew was that in her will she had left specific, time-sensitive, instructions for Poe to follow, but her preordained time had yet to come. So Poe remained their leader for now, and they continued their missions.

Rose had just been arguing with Finn about that very topic. She was convinced Finn was one of the few chosen by Leia to eventually follow out her instructions, but Finn didn't agree.

"Rose, I haven't been here as long as others. And I used to be a stormtrooper. I mean, come on."

"Everyone looks up to you Finn! They only care about your plans for the future, and most of the newer recruits don't even know that you haven't always been apart of the Resistance." He started to respond but stopped. They had been watching the lesson for a while, but something in particular, must have caught his attention. Rose couldn't figure out what, so she pulled at his sleeve to get his attention. He nodded in Carson's direction.

"Oh." He was standing apart from the others, hands in fists, blatantly glaring at Rey. Rose felt a little perturbed by his stance. Carson was usually such an amiable, level-headed guy.

"What's gotten into him?" Finn sighed in response.

"I'm not entirely sure. He was acting kind of weird this morning and asking about Kylo Ren. But I'm worried about him. He has this massive thing for Rey, and she obviously doesn't feel the same way. I'm worried he'll do something rash."

Rey paused for a moment and looked over at them, silently asking if they needed anything. Rose waved her off and they continued walking.

"At least you'll get to spend some time with him. Maybe you guys can talk about it."

"Yeah. Although this is going to be a pretty serious mission. Carson and I already had a special training session to prepare for it."

"Are you nervous?" He shook his head. 

"I'm actually a little excited. It'll be nice to be doing something other than recruitment for once. But I'd rather be doing an easy run with you." Rose flushed as she looked up at a cheekily grinning Finn. She bumped him with her shoulder then threaded her fingers through his.

"Me too."

* * *

Rey was beginning to feel a little worried. She'd been having such a great morning, but now she had another Carson-colored cloud hanging over her head.

She had been trying to help Chelien, a force-sensitive Sluissi when she first noticed him glaring at her.

"Ah. Now you notisse him." Chelien's forked tongue flitted in and out of his mouth.

"Hisss emotionss have been ssslipping into ourss. He wantsss to sspeak with you."

Chelien was the newest member of their training group, and one of the few she hadn't been looking for. He had been recruited for starship design by Poe quite a while ago. Rey had met him by chance a few weeks back, and in feeling his power, invited him to lessons. He already understood the Force and consistent with most Sluissi, was at peace with himself. He was there more to help than to learn.

"I will guide othersss. You musst help him with keeping his emottionss from usss." Chelien slithered away, his green and occasional purple scales blinking at the reflection of the sun.  _ He's definitely unique, even among other Sluissi.  _ Rey had always found it interesting that Chelien chose to open himself to the thoughts and emotions around him instead of closing them off. It could be dangerous but he's managed, and it was something Rey admired. He told her it helped him remain peaceful, the different emotions balancing each other.

Rey took a deep breath before approaching Carson. Opening her mental guard a sliver, she could feel that Chelien had been right. Carson's emotions were freely broadcasting through the air around him, making Rey cringe. He had become adept in many aspects of the Force but still had a hard time with his emotions.

As she came to stand in front of him she noticed him cracking his knuckles. The action seemed harsh and at odds with his personality, adding to her uneasiness.

"We need to talk, Rey. In private." The look in his eyes made her stomach drop. Warnings whispered past her ears and through her mind. She knew he would have to wait. The younglings couldn't be around for whatever he was going to say. 

"Okay. Can we talk later? I was hoping to check in with a few others before lunch." He blew out a harsh breath and replied, "Fine. We'll talk. At lunch." Rey nodded and started, "But Carson you need to work on your guards. Your emotions are everywhere and—." Before she could finish he turned and stalked away.  _ And you're upsetting the younglings.  _

Turning back she gathered the younglings around her and once again explained to them the importance of keeping their guard up.

"Not only will it keep you from feeling someone else's emotions, but it will keep your mind safe from prying eyes. If you aren't careful anyone could get into your mind, and there could be consequences. Understand?" The four younglings nodded solemnly. Rey smiled then, hoping to recreate the cheerful atmosphere that had existed before Carson's dark cloud came and rained all over them. 

The younglings returned to their spots, following Chelien's instructions. Rey circled the blindfolded group. The goal of this exercise was to heighten their sense of the world around them. They would have to follow instructions given without sight. While they trained Rey took turns attempting to tap into their minds. If she was able to get in, she would take a moment to pull that person aside and try to help them strengthen their guard.

There was lots of laughter as the lesson went on and Rey tried to keep her anxiety over Carson out of the way.  _ What does he want? Does he want to talk about our relationship, and if he does I'll have to reject him and then everything will just get worse. Or does he know something about- _ . She cut herself off before the thought could go any farther, and returned her attention to the happy pupils in front of her.

* * *

Kylo was in a meeting when he felt it. 

At first, he thought he was being attacked mentally, or even poisoned. Whatever it was, he felt weakened. 

Then Kylo realized he was feeling an odd sensation along the thin line that existed in the Force, the line connecting him to Rey. It was unnatural and chilling. Something was terribly wrong. 

Instead of its usual thrumming, the connection felt jerky and erratic. It felt tainted.

He stood suddenly, knocking his chair to the ground, the room coming to attention until he was out the door, all eight Praetorian Guards in tow. 

* * *

General Hux watched Ren's theatrical exit with disdain.  _ Was it really necessary to knock the chair to the ground?  _ Hux sneered. Somehow his cape even managed to swirl dramatically as the doors closed behind him. 

Hux theorized that Ren planned these sudden interruptions and departures as some sort of power move. No one else could act the way he did unless they wanted severe consequences. But Ren got away with it because he was lucky enough to be born with this dominating power, giving no room for others.

Hux planned to change that. Somehow this was just further evidence adding to his odd sense that things were about to begin going his way.

* * *

After declaring that everyone was improving and that she could be found after lunch in the training room, she dismissed everyone to go eat. 

Rey was purposely lagging behind the group and if anyone noticed, they didn't say anything. As they got closer Rey could see Carson waiting outside, and she took a few deep breaths as he approached her.

"We should take a walk." It was more of a statement than a request, but Rey followed him anyway as they went back towards the clearing, looking back longingly for a moment as her stomach grumbled, and then continued next to him. He said nothing so Rey decided to begin whatever conversation they were about to have.

"Alright Car. What is it? This whole dark brooding thing is concerning." She tried to keep her tone light, but she couldn't keep her nervousness out.

"I thought you liked brooding." His tone was harsh and sarcastic sounding, and Rey couldn't make heads or tails of what he could possibly be talking about.

"What’s that supposed to mean?" It came out more forcefully than she intended, and Carson stopped to face her.

"Give me the real reason you didn't tell Poe about Kylo Ren." Rey's mind sped up at the mention of his name. She tried to laugh, but it fell flat.

"I already explained. I didn't realize it was that big of a deal. Is that what you're so upset about because I-." He cut her off as he stepped closer.

"Kylo Ren didn't stop my blast.” He jabbed his finger towards her chest, “You did. You're protecting him and it's making me sick trying to come up with a reason why!" 

He was in her face now, eyes blazing and Rey felt a chill run down her back. She tried to keep her response calm, "Carson. I am not protecting him. I don't know what's made you think that could be the case, but I assure you it's not." Carson didn't respond, but he was cracking his knuckles again so she tried to remind him--and herself--of what was real.

"He’s our enemy Carson." Saying those words made her chest tight, and she tried to ignore the feeling in her heart telling her it wasn't true. Carson once again made no response, but his eyes were searching hers angrily. 

Belatedly, Rey realized there was no one else around. He was getting too close and Rey started feeling a little panicked. She was about to take a step back when he roughly grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her.

* * *

Rose grinned as Rey's group of recruits streamed in, the younglings bouncing in the front. Watching over the younglings was a task that Rose often requested, and she laughed as the little ones ran over to meet her for lunch.

"How was your lesson?" 

The youngest, a Twi'lek, known only as Clover due to her light green skin tone, jumped up and down in her excitement. 

"We had to find our way around blindfolded! And Miss Rey said I was doing a great job protecting my mind!" Rose felt her heart melt a little. 

"And where is Miss Rey?" She looked around the room, hoping to catch her for a moment, but couldn't see her. 

Another youngling answered, "She was talking to Carson. They didn't come in." There wasn't anything particularly alarming about his statement, but a bad feeling in her gut whispered something was wrong. 

"Well why don't you guys go get lunch, and when I get back you can tell me everything you learned!" They nodded and then followed the adults from their group to get something to eat. Rose decided she was going to go check on Rey, just in case.  _ But really, what danger could she be in?  _ If anything, someone trying to mess with Rey would be in trouble. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :-ll


	6. Answers

Rey pulled back right away but wasn't fast enough. He had his hands on either side of her head and he trying to dig into her mind. Rey didn't know how he was doing it or where he learned this but it felt awful. It hurt even more than Ben trying to get the map from her. Even worse than Snoke taking Luke's location.

"Carson stop!" She kicked him in the knee and he winced but didn't let go. She was trying to pry his fingers away when she suddenly found she couldn't move.

Frozen in place, she had never felt so powerless. 

She was struggling to keep him out of her mind, but she couldn't access the Force. That in itself was completely frightening, but then he was in her head and he was stabbing and piercing and suddenly he was pulling on her connection to Ben and all she could do was watch. 

Rey hadn't even realized how precious it was to her until he was touching it and tainting it. It physically hurt and Rey couldn't stop him. She felt as though she might fall over, but Carson's hands around her head kept her upright.

He was starting in on her memories now. His search was rough and he was getting too close to last night.  _ He can't see that. _ She tried one last time to stop him, gathering any remaining strength and using her desperation to make a final push.

It barely worked. That single memory was blacked out and though Rey knew that he would find everything else, that moment belonged to her and Ben. 

_ Ben. _

"Ben!" It came out weak and anguished, but that's what she was and Rey was running out of options. If he hadn't heard her, she didn't know what else she could do. 

But then she felt his presence, he was behind her, all anger and fear and distress. He was just as scared as she was.

* * *

The doors to his chamber slammed closed, keeping his guards out, but Kylo hardly noticed. All he could feel was a blinding pain before he heard it. 

_ Ben.  _

He panicked for a moment, not knowing what to do. Their connection was usually so effortless but nothing was happening. 

He closed his eyes and focused on his name being called across the universe. Something was twisting their connection and he could feel it growing weak. He worried he wouldn't get through. 

But then they were connecting and all Kylo could see was a boneless Rey, as someone or something held her up by her head. He practically growled. Her eyes were closed and tears were dripping off her chin.

He rushed forward, wrapping his arms around her waist, prepared to do whatever it might take to stop her from being hurt.

* * *

Carson was hardly thinking as he slashed through her mind, fingers digging deep enough into her scalp to draw blood. He had tried to locate the origin of the connection he found within her mind, but when he was unable to, he gave up and began to search her memories. 

Moments were flashing through his mind, bits and pieces coming together.

_ "You know I can take whatever I want."  _

_ "Monster!"  _

_ "Did he tell you?"  _

_ "I'd never felt more alone."  _

_ "You are not alone." _

_ "Rey, I want you to join me."  _

_ "Please."  _

And he kept going. He was seeing all the times she thought of him, and all the times she missed him and he was getting closer to something—. It was gone. There had been something so important to her that she did everything in her power to keep it away from him. But that wouldn't do. He had to find it now. Didn't he realize that when she fought back all he wanted was to see further?

He heard her whimper, "Ben." And though he now knew of their connection, and the danger he was in, Carson was still shocked when Kylo Ren: the Supreme Leader, son of Leia and Han, and former student of Luke Skywalker, appeared before his eyes. 

He was pulling Rey away with a scared look on his face that Carson struggled to process. 

He looked down at his hands for a moment, watching small drops of Rey's blood fall to the ground. Rey who was now unconscious in Kylo Ren's arms. His mind wasn't working fast enough to process all of this, when the Supreme Leader spoke, his words drenched in fury.

"What have you done?" The power emanating from Kylo ren forced Carson to freeze in place, his limbs aching and stiff. He didn't answer, instead, he waited for the inevitable attack.

He didn't have to wait for long. Carson's feet barely left the ground as his throat started tightening. The Supreme Leader began to pierce Carson's mind, the pain blinding.

He put up with it for a few moments, never however allowing him to see past the time he's spent with the Resistance. His face began to redden, and while his first instinct was to panic, he pushed it aside and instead focused his energy on searching for a distraction. 

When he sensed someone nearing the field, he knew he could extricate himself. He just had to do it at the right moment, to make Kylo Ren believe he was the one who released him.

Forcing his pain to stay in the back of his mind, Carson cautiously slipped into Kylo's senses, waiting for him to notice the person entering the field. It didn't take long.

* * *

Someone entered the field and cried out, causing Kylo to lose his hold on Rey's attacker. He didn't know if it was the force connection that had weakened him, but for whatever reason, he couldn't retain his hold. He tried to reach out once more, but the man's mind was too slippery and for a moment Kylo was distracted. There were very few people who he was unable to get to.

Before he could do anything else, the man ran off. Kylo cursed. With Rey anchoring him in place, he couldn't go after the blackguard. He looked down, concentrating on Rey instead.

"Rey. Please, I need you to wake up." When she didn't respond, he knelt to the ground, gently laying her in the grass and carefully put his fingertips to her forehead. He closed his eyes and focused.

Kylo found her in there somewhere, and he tried to pull her out. 

_ Rey _ . Nothing. 

_ Someone's coming Rey, and I have to go, but I need you to wake up so I know you're alright. _ She was stirring. 

_ Please. _ He could feel her hesitating. 

_ Your friends need you Rey… I need you. Please come back to me.  _

And then she was awake. He opened his eyes to see her looking up at him, a horrified expression on her face.

Her lips barely moved as she asked, "What happened?" He could sense two people approaching and so instead of answering, he lowered his head to kiss her forehead and whispered, "You're going to be safe now. Your friends are coming." He was pulling away when she lifted her shaking hand to his cheek and wiped a tear away. He hadn't even realized he was crying. It was not like him. 

Beginning to disconnect he put his hand over hers, and as the connection was ending she opened up her mind to show him one small memory. 

It was tinged with pain and fear, but it was powerful. Experiencing Rey's pain and the weakness she had been subjected to, Kylo watched, tears falling, as Rey used the rest of her strength to hide last night. 

New emotions began to simmer beneath the surface, full of rage and powerlessness, but he was running out of time, so Kylo tried to focus on Rey instead. 

"Rey I-" They were disconnected before he could finish.

* * *

Rose entered the field just in time to see Carson running away and Kylo Ren leaning over Rey. If Carson was running she knew her help wouldn't be any sort of help at all. She made the split-second decision to go back, hoping to find someone armed who could help her.

She was lucky, Chewie was just about to go inside when she called out.

"I need your help! It's Rey." And then she ran back towards the field, praying to the stars he was following. And that they wouldn't be too late. He caught up with her, bowcaster drawn, growling a question. She just shook her head, she had no answers.

They ran into the field in time to see Rey reach up for Kylo Ren before he just disappeared. Rose and Chewie stopped in shock.  _ How is that even possible? _

She didn't have time to think on it as Chewie pushed forward, going to kneel beside Rey's motionless form. She rushed over, taking a breath of relief when she saw that Rey was still breathing. Rose touched her shoulder, "Rey? Can you hear me? What happened?" Her eyes blinked open quickly.

"He attacked me. He knows." It came out in a whisper almost as if she was in shock. "He's trained. But how?" Rose and Chewie looked at each other as Rey continued talking to herself.

She sat up suddenly as if finally noticing their presence. 

"Where is he? We need to find him right now." Rose answered, "Rey, he just disappeared. How'd he even find you?" She looked confused but answered, "He wanted to talk to me about something, so we walked out here and that's when he attacked me." Rose didn't know if she would ever be more bewildered than she was at this moment. 

Rey was back to muttering then, saying something about not feeling her legs. Rose had never seen her so undone. It was completely disconcerting.

"Rey," She said slowly, "Why would you willingly go on a walk with Kylo Ren?" Rey had been holding her head in her hands, but the minute Rose said Kylo Ren she looked up.

"What are you talking about?" The pure confusion Rose was feeling made her wish there was a wall she could smash her head against.

"Rwaaarhhgw." Came from Chewie. They looked to Rey waiting for an answer. Instead of responding. Rey pulled at her hair a little, causing some blood to drop onto her arm. Rey muttered, "Must have been his fingernails."

Rose watched the blood streak down Rey's arm, coming to the sudden and horrible realization that Kylo Ren could have damaged Rey's mind.

"Rey we need to get you to a medic. Maybe then I can find Carson and get some clear answers."

Chewie seemed to agree because he handed his heavy bowcaster to Rose, then lowered his arms, intending to pick Rey up who was still muttering. Rose's words must have just barely registered because Rey shouted, "NO!" It startled Rose so badly she almost dropped the bowcaster. 

She realized then she'd never actually heard Rey yell before. The unexpected harshness of it oddly made her feel like crying.

"No." Rey was more restrained with her objection this time but still sounded slightly crazed. "You have to stay with me. You can't go for Carson alone. He's the one who attacked me."

* * *

She had wanted to hunt down Carson immediately. He couldn't have gone far, but she couldn't move her legs so she instead allowed Chewie to carry her to the infirmary. Rose was quiet on their way over, and Rey didn't miss the worried look on her face.  _ She thinks I'm crazy. _

Rey didn't blame her, she was feeling erratic and out of sorts. 

She didn't know how she would convince Rose—or anyone for that matter—that Carson had attacked her. It had been completely unexpected.

And that wasn't the only problem. Rose obviously thought that Ben had done something, which meant they had seen him and Rey had no idea how she was going to explain his presence. If anyone found out about her connection to Ben… Well, it definitely wouldn't be good. She could end up friendless, and she didn't want that. They might think she was a spy, or they would try to use her against Ben. The possibilities flying through her mind made her feel sick.

Rey knew that no one would understand Ben the way she did, nor could they understand their c _ onnection, which made it very likely she would be forced to make a decision.  _ But how could I? The Rey from a year ago would have had no problem making a choice, she wouldn't even have to ask the question. But things were very different now.

They were almost outside the infirmary now, where a few passers-by looked on curiously. Rey tried to sink deeper into Chewie's arms, feeling small and weak, and wishing she could be standing on her own two feet. Her cheeks reddened and noticing Rey's unease, Rose waved them off. They turned away as Chewie ducked inside the small building.

* * *

After scanning Rey's body, the medical droid had explained that she should be able to feel her legs again within the hour.

"It is a rare occurrence, but occasionally when a being is held by the force, the hold can last past the controller's release. I will clean your head wounds, and then you can wait here until you feel your legs once more."

Once the medical droid had performed its duty, it shut down, waiting for someone else to utilize it. 

Chewie had gone to get some food after promising not to tell anyone else what had happened until Rey was okay.

That left Rose with Rey, who was still worried about the latter's mental state. She didn't want to push Rey, but she also wanted answers.

Rey was sitting against the wall on a cot, with Rose in a chair beside her.

"Rey," She began gently, "I need to know what happened." Rey took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She wasn't eager to relive it, but they needed to sort everything out. 

"Carson was very upset this morning and I couldn't figure out why." Rose nodded as she and Finn had witnessed this personally. Rey continued, "He wanted to talk at lunch, and the whole conversation was so confusing, but then he kissed me." As Rey's voice shook, Rose took her hand.

"I pulled away, but he had already grabbed onto my head and then I couldn't move at all and he was tearing through my mind." A few tears leaked out of Rey's closed eyes, and she took a moment before continuing.

"The part I don't understand though is that he was clearly trained. And it wasn't by me. And at first I thought it was all because he liked me and he was mad or something," Rey opened her eyes then and faced Rose, "but something else was going on, and it wasn't until we were here that I realized something. I remember how I found and met every single one of my recruits, but I can't remember how we met Carson. Don't you think that's odd?" Rose opened her mouth, ready to tell Rey how they found Carson but then she realized she didn't know either. It seemed impossible. It hurt her head, trying to remember a first meeting even, but there was nothing.

Her open mouth turned to a disbelieving gape.

"How is that possible?" Rey shook her head.

"I have no idea, but obviously we need to get some answers. There's something else going on here and I'm worried." Rose nodded in agreement, there was definitely something fishy going on. But then she remembered something else.

"I admit that I didn't believe you about Carson." Rey started to speak, but Rose quickly interrupted her, "I do now. But Rey, that doesn't explain why Chewie and I saw Kylo Ren. I mean, we definitely both saw him and then he just disappeared into thin air. And you were reaching for him! Or something." Rey had closed her eyes again, but Rose continued as something else occurred to her.

"And you know this morning Finn said Carson was being all weird and asking about Kylo Ren. You can't deny he's got to be apart of this somehow too. Even if you don't remember him being there. Wait, Rey, what if they're working toget—" She cut off when Rey let go of her hand.

"They're not working together." Rose was surprised by Rey's decisive tone.

"How do you know?" Rey was silent. She looked like she was struggling. 

"Rose, I'm about to tell you something that I haven't told anyone else. And I know it's going to be hard to take in, but can you just listen to everything I have to say? From start to finish?" Rose was getting nervous now, but she also felt like she might die of curiosity, so she nodded.

"Okay. Well here's the thing I—" Rey started pulling at her fingers, and Rose worried she wasn't going to go on, but then everything came tumbling out. And Rose couldn't have been more shocked.

"I don't know how it happened, but while I was with Luke, a connection was formed between me and Kylo Ren. Somehow we were able to see and communicate with each other from across the universe. The connection's never lasted very long. But at some point, we started to understand each other. We both had visions of the future, but they weren’t the same. I saw Ben turning to the light, so—and no one but Chewie knows—I went to Kylo. I thought I could bring him back. But then he brought me to Snoke and despite everything Snoke was saying I was still so sure that he would turn. Then Snoke commanded Kylo to kill me, but he killed Snoke instead and then we fought off all these guards and I thought he was going to save the fleet. But he didn't and he wanted me to join him. He wanted me to rule with him.” Her babble stopped as Rey looked saddened all of a sudden. 

“I wouldn't. I left him.” Rey choked on her words, tears starting to fall. 

“Chewie and I came for you guys on Crait, and I blocked him out." Rose couldn't believe what she was hearing. She thought Rey was done but she kept going.

"I hadn't seen him since, but then Leia died and I couldn't keep him out. And then I was foolish enough to show up on Jakku and he was there and I stopped the blast Carson would have killed him with. And he saved me from Carson. Just now anyways, that's what Carson found. My bond with Kylo. I was so desperate that I called out for him, and if I hadn't I don't know what would have happened." Rey finally stopped rambling, but Rose didn't say anything. She couldn’t say anything. Rey had practically just vomited this all out, and she was trying to process it. Her thoughts weren’t anywhere close to coherent, but slowly, a few main points began to stand out.

_ Rey cares for Kylo Ren.  _

_ Kylo Ren killed Snoke.  _

_ Kylo Ren saved Rey.  _

_ Carson tried to hurt Rey.  _

_ Rey is my friend and I want to trust her. _

_ I do trust her. _

There was so much more than that going on, and Rose could think of many reasons not to trust Rey and her connection with Kylo Ren. But on top of it all, Rose came to the sobering realization that Rey had to deal with this all by herself. That she must have felt so alone, and with those thoughts in mind, she reached over and hugged Rey as tightly as she could.

She could tell she had taken Rey completely by surprise, so she pulled back, grabbing both of Rey's hands in hers and squeezed.

"I can't say I understand most of this. But you're my friend, and I trust you. And if Kylo Ren is going to make a habit of saving you, then I will try to deal with this. I can't make any promises though. He's still part of the First Order. He’s still hurt so many people. This doesn't absolve him of anything." Rey had tears streaming down her face as she nodded.

"It might take some time to get used to this. I know you didn't have a family, but you have one now. You're not alone anymore Rey, and you can tell me anything. Okay?" Rey tried to stop a sob but ended up making a snot bubble instead and had to pull her hands away to wipe her nose.

"Thank you."

"Of course. Now isn’t the time, but you do know you’re going to have to tell me more right?" Rey nodded smiling, and Rose stood up then, looking through the shelves for something Rey could blow her nose with.

* * *

Rey felt much better after she blew her nose and wiped up her face. Rose seemed to be waiting, so she took a few deep breaths to compose herself and then spoke.

"My legs are starting to tingle a little, so I think I'll be able to stand up soon. But until then I think we need some sort of plan."

"I agree. Starting with what we're going to tell Finn and Poe. You're going to have to alter your story a little to keep Kylo out." Rey smiled at that, glad they were on the same page.

"I thought, for now, we could just tell them that he ran away when you and Chewie arrived."

"Okay. That's almost what happened anyhow. But then I think we need to sit down with them and go through our recruits the best we can. The safest thing to assume right now is that Carson was a spy, but what if there were others?" Rey felt stricken. For some reason, the possibility that there might be spies among the recruits had never occurred to her. 

"You're completely right. That will be our next priority after searching for Carson, although I'm almost positive he's long gone by now."

* * *

Carson was gone. Taking an X-wing had been simple, he was well known and easily trusted. He took off for Takodana, knowing he would be able to set up a meeting there.

The Resistance could track his ship, but by the time they found it, he would be long gone. He put the ship on autopilot, set an alarm to warn of his arrival and sitting upright, went straight to sleep.

When he woke some hours later, he felt stronger and refreshed. He hadn't used that much power in quite some time, and the effort had left him feeling queasy.

Resettling himself, he took back over the X-wing, heading for a small landing hangar.

Forty minutes later he found himself inside a small cantina sitting at a small table. The barkeep recognized him when he walked in, so all he had to do was wait.

It wasn't long before a familiar-looking Rodian showed up.

"What are you doing here Greenling? Have you completed your task?"

"Not exactly, but there has been a development. I need to speak to Recon as soon as possible." The Rodian hissed.

"You do not get to make demands. You know he will summon you when he is ready." Carson was tired of this. He opened his hand under the table, beginning the process of crushing the Rodian's windpipes.

"I am making demands now because I have important information. You will bring me to Recon right away. Do you understand?" The Rodian nodded frantically, then left the room in a rush, hand to his throat. 

Sipping his drink, Carson sat back and waited.

* * *

Hux was in his chambers, preparing to send for his spymaster when the woman herself entered.

"Delta-Green. I was just about to summon you. Is there a problem?"

"Not exactly sir, but I have just received word that Greenling has abandoned his post and wants to meet with me." It took a moment for Hux to identify the spy associated with the code name. He had so many spies and operations to keep track of. 

Realizing who they were talking about Hux grew worried. Greenling contacting them while on a mission could have disastrous consequences. He needed more information.

"Was he discovered?"

"No. He took himself out. He believes he has valuable information."

"He wouldn't risk his family's safety, so it must be." Hux thought for a moment then continued, "We will go to him right away. His time was coming to an end anyway." She nodded and turned, back towards him and head down. He took his time in gathering what he needed, knowing she would have to wait. 

Finished, he turned sharply and left the room, Delta-Green moments behind him.

Such was the protocol Hux had implemented, and it was worth it. He never tired of the power he held, nor did he plan on losing it. Everything he did was to ensure it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say that I have lied. I'm definitely not going to finish this before The Rise of Skywalker. I barely have time to edit the chapters I've already written.   
Anyways, that was an eventful chapter. Any thoughts? ;))


	7. Before the Storm

Carson was waiting for Recon to show up. He had only met her a few times before now, but each time he couldn't help but wonder who had hired her.

When he was younger, Carson had heard tales of great spymasters, ones who would be hired by powerful beings with loads of money. He and his brothers had often playacted as spies, dreaming of action and unlimited riches.

But now the spymasters were part of his reality, and his childhood imaginings were nowhere close to the truth. 

You didn't choose to work with the spymasters. They choose you. And they would ensure you did your job by capturing your family and holding them against you.

Carson despised it, but he couldn't deny that it was effective. There was no way he would ever risk his family's safety, and so he did what he was told. And he did it well.

Although, he needed to keep his thoughts as far away from his true self as possible. Delving too far into sentimental memories could ruin the persona that had been so carefully crafted by his spymaster team. He had made it this far without mistakes, he could go a little longer as Carson.

Decidedly avoiding the topic previously on his mind, Carson tried to distract himself with the people around him. He took his time scanning the mostly empty cantina. 

There were a few people at a table in the corner and someone sitting hunched over at the bar. Nothing drew his attention and wanting something to do with his hands he went to the counter.

The filthy-looking fellow sitting there glanced at Carson for a moment before turning back to his drink. Carson stood there waiting as the bartender entered from a doorway.

"Sorry for the wait. What can I get you?" The bartender refused to meet Carson's eyes, which once again drew the attention of the now-muttering man. Raising an eyebrow Carson responded, "Just some juice. Whatever's best." The bartender nodded before turning to fill Carson's order.

"S-so, what brings you h-here?" Carson kept his face blank and wished the bartender wasn't so afraid of him. Then he wouldn't have had to talk to this grungy looking man, who was now looking at Carson quizzically as if trying to predict what he had done to the bartender.

"Just waiting for a friend." He said pointedly, needing to put an end to this conversation.

"You m-must keep important company to be scaring th-this man." Undoubtedly having been listening in on the conversation, the bartender dropped the glass he was holding, the shatter claiming the attention of the small group in the corner. Carson seethed, struggling to keep his temper in check. 

Quickly adding power to his words, as to avoid any further problems or unwanted attention he announced, "Everything is fine. Go on your way." Abruptly the group in the corner began making their excuses, apologizing to each other for forgetting about some other event they had to tend to. The bartender was gone again, either having forgotten what he was doing or grabbing a broom, leaving Carson alone with the man who was once again muttering.

"Ah… yes, must go… see to it…" He got up, taking his time as he left the cantina without looking back. With no one left in the room, Carson allowed himself to roll his eyes. He often wished that everyone would just keep to themselves. Life would be a lot less complicated if they did. 

Sensing the bartender was still in the backroom, Carson went around the counter and made his own drink before returning to his table. 

Taking a sip of his drink, Carson finally allowed himself to relax a little. He felt in control of the situation now, he just hoped that the bartender wouldn't make any other foolish mistakes, because if he did, Carson would have a hard time keeping him safe.

* * *

Hux sat in the secret compartment of Delta-Green's ship, watching her movements through a hidden camera on her suit. She was making her way inside the small cantina Greenling had contacted her through. He spotted Greenling sitting alone at a table in the back, looking wary as Delta-Green advanced.

He turned to his other surveillance screens for a moment, checking the cameras set up around the cantina for any sign of the Resistance or other potential problems. 

Normally he would not bother to perform an action so beneath his station, but in order to keep this operation as quiet as possible, Hux was required to play more than one role.

Seeing nothing that could turn problematic, Hux returned to Delta-Green's bodycam, watching Greenling stand when she came to a stop in front of him.

"Sit down Greenling." Delta-Green's voice came through crystal clear thanks to the new tech Hux had been overseeing. He smirked in satisfaction.

"You abandoned your post. You may have compromised your partner. I hope you have good reason for this." For a moment, Hux thought he sensed some guilt in Greenling's features, but he nodded confidently, his face otherwise impassive.

"There is a bylaw within the spymasters that allows for the release of a family in exchange for certain information. I believe I hold information that will be extremely useful to whoever you are working for." Hux was sure Delta-Green was raising an eyebrow, just as he was.

"And?" Greenling sat forward in his seat, folding his arms on the small table.

"I would like to request my family's freedom in exchange for this information." Hux was impressed, though he would be hard-pressed to admit it. This man was clearly sure of his intell, but he would be disappointed. Delta-Green was about to shut him down. 

Incidentally, that was one of Hux's favorite things to do. Crush confident spirits. _ Ah. Here it comes. _

"Yes. Well, Greenling, that only works in certain situations." Her tone was icy as she continued, "And in this instance, you are currently on a mission, and thus any intel you bring us is already required and will receive no extra payment." Hux waited for Greenling's shoulders to slump or to see a slight frown appear on his lips, but nothing changed.

"I do understand. However, my mission was to collect any and all information I could on the scavenger Rey. What I have pertains to the current Supreme Leader. Kylo Ren." Hux stiffened in shock. Then he jabbed the com and barked, "Whatever it takes Green. Whatever it takes."

Delta-Green flinched, presumably at Hux's sudden command in her ear. He cared not. Hux wanted--_nay, needed_\--anything and everything he could use. Delta-Green paused for a moment before she replied.

"Fine. If I find your intel to be profitable, we can make the trade."

"Isn't that your employer's decision?" Hux could tell Delta-Green didn't like having her authority undermined, but she responded, "It has already been approved. Now, please explain."

Congruent with Hux's disgusting and power-hunger personality, it was things like this that got him excited. His heart rate sped up, and he licked his lips in anticipation. 

As if he somehow knew the power he was holding over Hux at the moment, a slight smirk appeared on his lips, and Greenling told his tale.

* * *

The training room was destroyed. 

Kylo supposed Hux would be frustrated, but at this point, he was beyond caring. Besides, Hux had disappeared and canceled their meetings for the rest of the day. 

In the past, when dealing with a foul mood, he could attend meetings and carefully take out his rage on the officers he met with. So, it was, in a way, Hux's fault that Kylo had nothing else to occupy his time with.

In the meantime, he was still struggling to rid himself of this rage. Deciding he needed someone to spar with, he opened the doors for a moment to summon one of his guards. Sparring helped him focus, and if he wasn't any calmer after fighting this guard, there were seven other replacements.

His crimson-clothed opponent turned to face him, and Kylo expanded his crackling lightsaber in response.

* * *

They were running low on energy and options. Rose and Rey had found and explained everything to Poe, who sent a few trusted members after Carson, but he was long gone, just as they had predicted. Since then, a small select group containing Poe, Chewie, Finn, Rose, Rey, and Kaydel Ko Connix, had gathered to access their current members.

And they were coming up with nothing. Which was either a good thing or a bad thing, and due to all the uncertainty, the mood was somber.

After they had exhausted their memories of the members, they had to deal with rearranging missions, alerting allies of what had happened, and they had to do it all very carefully.

It was agreed upon that Carson had been a spy, and they had to assume that at the moment, he was telling someone everything he knew about the Resistance. 

Their question was then Carson's employer. It was widely agreed upon that the First Order was somehow part of this. Rey was mostly in agreement with this assessment but also knew that Ben hadn't known specifically about Carson. Which most likely meant he had been in the Resistance, spying for a specific person as opposed to an organization. Finn seemed to be having similar thoughts.

"The First Order doesn't directly employ spies, they have their own teams for that. But I do know that some generals have been known to work with spymasters. They prefer to hold certain information until someone actually needs it. It helps them gain power." Rose spoke up, "So he could have been working for a spymaster. Is it possible we could hire our own spymaster to answer any of our questions?"

"Hah. Good luck with that. Spymasters only make themselves known to the very powerful and very wealthy. None of us would even have a chance at meeting a spymaster."

"I happen to know a spymaster. Or at least I did." Everyone looked to Poe in surprise.

"I could try to get into contact. See if they might be able to help out." While Rey very much wanted to know how Poe knew a supposedly intangible spymaster, she said nothing. 

No one disagreed with the idea, pushing the discussion forward. Kaydel who had been quiet for a few minutes, seemingly deep in thought, now spoke up.

"There is something a little odd about the whole Carson thing. He seemed pretty fixated on Rey. Has anyone else thought of that?" Rey looked to her left as both Finn and Poe started to nod slowly.

"You're right Kay. I guess we all assumed it was because he liked her—or we were supposed to believe that—but yeah. He did ask about Rey a lot. Sometimes he even asked things I was pretty sure he already knew. I just thought that he liked hearing about Rey or something." It was silent for a moment before Rose commented, "So are we theorizing that he was focusing on Rey? And no offense Rey, but why would he focus on you?"

"None taken," Rey grinned at Rose, "I was wondering the same thing. I mean, technically I have my own agenda and priorities. Why not target Poe? He's the leader." Once again heads nodded in agreement around the room.

"Well, could it be that he--and whoever he was working for--thought that Rey would be an easier target? If you're romantically involved with someone, you might be more likely to share secrets. And we can all agree Carson's fixation was seemingly romantic. That ploy wouldn't have worked with Poe, eh Poe?" Kaydel finished jokingly. The group turned to Poe, laughing and waiting for some sort of retort. Instead, his face was reddened and he uncharacteristically struggled for words. 

There were more important things to think about, but Rey mentally put this moment away to examine some other time. Poe finally spit out a response.

"Right. Yeah—yeah. That wouldn't have worked on me." The silence that followed was awkward, though it only lasted for a moment due to Rey nearly falling off her chair in surprise.

Finn laughed a little as he asked, "You good?" Now it was Rey's turn to blush and stutter as she tried to explain herself.

"I just uh--thought there was a spider crawling on me." It was a pathetic response, but she could think of nothing better. 

Finn, who knew that Rey didn't mind spiders at all, looked suspicious, while Rose tilted her head at Rey. She nodded slightly in acknowledgment of Rose's silent question. Ben was here.

* * *

Kylo was on his bed attempting to meditate when he felt the familiar tugging. The feeling pulled him along a bright line that existed within the Force, connecting him and Rey. He opened his eyes to see her across the room from him, stuttering something about a spider.

Upon seeing her, Kylo felt the sudden urge to rush over and wrap her in his arms. That made him scowl. All these impulses he had concerning Rey needed to stop. No good would come of them. Instead, he stayed in place, looking over her carefully, checking for any problems. He didn't know what to say after everything that had happened but was saved by Rey's whisper in his mind.

_ "I think this will work. Is it working?" _Kylo nodded but Rey wasn't looking at him.

_ "Yes. Is there a reason that we aren't speaking out loud?" _

_ "I'm in a meeting right now. We've never really connected around other people, do you think they would hear you if they can't see you?" _Kylo had been wondering the same thing.

_ "I have no idea. Maybe we should check." _

_ "Okay. Just make a sound or something." _ He coughed in response, then waited for Rey's reaction.

_ "No one heard you. Very interesting." _ This instantly pulled a laugh from Kylo. Rey's face reddened and he waited as she made a comment about being too warm.

_ "What's so funny?" _

_ "It just used to be me wondering about our bond and wanting to experiment. I found it humorous I suppose." _ Rey nodded, but he wasn't sure it was meant for him.

_ "Is there someone in front of me? Or behind me?" _

_ "Yeah. You're right behind Finn." _

_ "Ah. The traitor. He's still alive then?" _ Rey shot him a glare.

_ "Yes. He's very much alive and very much my friend. So leave him alone." _ Kylo lifted his hands in mock surrender. Someone must have noticed Rey glaring as she said, "I was just thinking. About things. Stuff." Kylo smirked. He liked seeing Rey uncomfortable.

_ "I'm going to finish this meeting. Can we talk later?" _

_ "Of course. I'll be here." _ She faded from view and left Kylo on his bed, contemplating the way her presence affected him and seemed to completely turn him around.

* * *

Carson stood and shook Recon's hand. A deal had been made. His family would be released and sent somewhere far away. He, in turn, would give a briefing encasing his operation and then have the mandatory three month wait between his next mission. During which he would be briefed and trained, while waiting for his previous alias to be erased. 

He doubted anyone would mourn the loss of Carson now. If he hadn't pulled out early, his character would have continued on in the Resistance, where he would have eventually been "killed". Resulting in sadness for the people he had befriended, but neatly wrapping up his mission, ensuring he and his intel would get back to the spymasters safely.

On the way to the door, he eyed the room carefully. He hadn't noticed anyone tuning in on their conversation, but you could never be too careful. Especially with what he had just shared. 

If his findings were used elsewhere, his trade would be canceled. Possibly risking his family's safety. Not that the trade was very safe from the start but he knew the information was valuable. Even more valuable if Carson was right, and Recon was employed by someone in the First Order.

He followed Recon out of the cantina, careful to reach out around him, checking over their surroundings. Sensing nothing amiss he attempted to question Recon.

"So, where will I be stationed this time?" She said nothing, eyes ahead as they neared a small hangar.

"Fine, I know it's classified. But I was just wondering what character I'll be playing this time. Hopefully someone more interesting than 'Carson' the friendly blonde." Recon stopped and gave him a sharp look.

"You know you are to remain in character until the blood transfer. Cutting this deal does not make your situation any different." He refrained from rolling his eyes or talking back and instead nodded. Recon started forward once more, and Carson was careful to stay a few steps behind her as they made their way towards her ship. The next mission couldn't come any sooner. _ Carson has such an insipid personality. _

* * *

Hux was still sitting in the hidden compartment when the ship took off. His mind was still buzzing after learning what Greenling had found. _ He cares for the girl. How careless of him. _

Of course, Hux didn't expect any different of Ren. He rarely thought things through in the first place, and could never be described as thoughtful. He practically destroyed everything he touched. And now it would be the scavenger girl who destroyed him.

His original plan was still going to work. It just needed some small adjustments. And he needed to ensure Greenling's employment would not be traced back to him. But for now, he needed Greenling to show him everything he had seen. Obviously, he needed to see this for himself. He might even keep Greenling around. Or maybe not. Greenling's fate wasn't his top priority at the moment. The downfall of Kylo Ren was. And absolutely nothing was going to get in his way. 

Not now.

* * *

Poe followed the group out the door, silent and deep in thought like the others. Changes were going to be made very quickly and everyone had a job. He was in charge of contacting their suppliers and finding a way to transfer everything for the time being. Finn and Rose were teamed up to transition the families and younglings, Kaydel would warn allies and visit places that could not be contacted. Chewie would take care of placing any stragglers that didn't fall under Finn and Rose's group, while Rey would make her way through their ranks, searching for spies.

There was a lot to get done, and on top of it all, Poe's innards felt like they were being put through a processor. He rarely felt this anxious, but the thought of contacting Tayo was messing with him. Things hadn't ended well the last time they saw each other, and though he knew this was their only chance of getting info from the spymasters, Poe was scared. He had to trust that Tayo wouldn't turn on him.

"Sorry guys, I just had one last thought." They stopped for a moment and looked towards Rose who was looking thoughtful.

"We've assumed many things about Carson, including that he must have used the force to somehow sneak his way inside. So could we assume that there could be another spy that is force-sensitive?" Poe thought this was completely logical, and Rey must have agreed.

"I'll start with my group then. I was planning on going over any records we have, and then working from there." She sounded upset by this, but Poe figured they all were. It was hard enough trying to rebuild something like the Resistance. It didn't make it any easier if you had to be wary of the people you were supposed to work with.

Poe felt like this was a moment when he was supposed to say something leader-like, to assure everyone.

"I know this is hard guys. And I regret that I didn't have to foresight to anticipate spies. I feel like that was usually something the older, more experienced leaders would deal with. Or at least anyone higher up on the chain of command. But we're all that was left. And we're all so young. Except for Chewie. How old are you anyways?"

"Gwwaarrgg." Everyone looked to him in surprise.

"How are you still alive!?" Now everyone looked to Finn in surprise. He grinned sheepishly.

"Sorry. I just was wondering cause you know, he must have lived through a lot. Probably multiple wars." He turned to Chewie, "Why don't you talk about your life more often?" Chewie growled in exasperation.

* * *

Rey had taken a copy of Poe's database and was in her room going through it, starting in the beginning. It was a lot. She knew she should have kept working on the records, but when Ben showed up, she allowed herself to abandon her work.

He appeared to be sitting on her bed, eating something with his legs crossed. The sudden thought of food made her stomach growl and she debated whether she wanted to talk to Ben or go get dinner. He smiled at her as if reading her thoughts, and then presented a solution.

"We can share if you want." She approached him curiously.

"Would that even work?"

"We can try. I have plenty." She sat across from him on the bed and crossed her legs like his.

"You're not going to poison me are you?" Rey asked jokingly. He chuckled then, giving Rey's stomach an odd feeling she distinctly knew wasn't hunger. He had gotten up to grab what she assumed was more food, leaving her a moment to take in his outfit. He was wearing a loose-fitting gray tunic, with comfy-looking black pants. It was probably the most informal thing she'd ever seen him wear. _ Except for that one time. _

The sudden image of Ben shirtless made her whole body flush with heat and she struggled to regain her composure.

He returned to the bed and sat back down.

"Are you sitting on your bed?"

"Yes. Are you?"

"Yeah. Don't you think it's funny how the bond places us? I mean, why don't we appear to be floating or upside-down or something?" Rey laughed at the image that conjured. Ben grinned at her and continued, "I'm just saying, this whole thing seems pretty convenient to me. I'd say we're pretty lucky." She looked at him carefully, taking in the calm that surrounded him. She reached out to touch his hand and softly said, "We are pretty lucky." They watched each other for a moment, a faint heat building between them before Rey got distracted by an amazing smell and realized she could see the food he had amassed. 

There was a small table set up next to his bed, covered in plates of food. She couldn't identify half of it if she tried. But she could try to eat half of it.

"Wow! You really do have plenty." She looked at him for permission and at his nod, reached for some sort of fruit, letting go of his hand. The table disappeared before she could touch it, and for a moment she was confused. _ Ah. Maintaining contact_. Then she moved forward, sitting a little closer and took his hand, watching as the food appeared before her. She grinned in satisfaction and reached for the fruit.

She carefully studied the fruit in her hands. It was a lighter green, spotted with a bit of brown and yellow. She already knew that it would be a greater quality than any fruit she would have tried in her past. If she had taken Ben's offer, so much would have been different. _ I would have been different. _ She could hardly fathom any of it. 

"I suppose we can just eat one-handed then." Ben's words pulled her out of her thoughts and she looked up in time to see him glance at their intertwined hands with a tiny smile before reaching for his own plate of food. She looked back at the fruit in her hand to hide her own smile and asked, "What is this I'm about to eat?"

"A pear. We grow them in greenhouses so we don't have to source them."

Rey watched him for a second, appreciating the lack of condescension in his answer. 

"Interesting." It was kind of interesting, but Rey was hungry so she stopped talking and started eating.

* * *

Sometime later they were both full, forcing Kylo to let go of her hand when he sent for someone to take the food away. He already missed the contact they had maintained while eating. 

He was amazed but not surprised at the number of foods that Rey had never tried and told himself to request a wider range of food from now on. Not just because of wishful thinking, but also because being with Rey reminded him of his privilege. It almost seemed wasteful to not take advantage of everything he had. 

Making sure the door was closed and locked, Kylo came back to his bed and laid down with his arm behind his head. Rey flopped down beside him, and for once he immediately reached for her hand, not even worried that she might reject him. He threaded his fingers through hers and she sighed contentedly, that small sound making his heart feel too large and his chest too tight. 

It was hard to recall a time he had ever felt more whole. 

"So Carson was a spy or something. We think that he was working for the spymasters. We also think that for whatever reason he was focused on me. So that's great. And now he knows about our connection and I'm not entirely sure what he's going to do with that information." Kylo thought about this for a moment before realizing something that made him tense up.

"What?"

"It's possible that he's working for Hux. I know he uses spymasters often, and he's been desperate for any information about you. It would make sense."

"That would fit. But what does he hope to gain from any of this information?"

"It makes him uncomfortable. Not knowing the enemy. He can usually profile someone and guess the choices they'll make, which helps him stay one step ahead. But he didn't know anything about you."

"He sounds pretty smart." Kylo scoffed.

"Yeah. And pretty annoying."

"Well based on Carson we're assuming that there are other spies in our group. You wouldn't happen to know anything would you?" Kylo turned his head to grin at her, knowing she was joking but still answered.

"What makes you think I would tell you?" Now it was Rey's turn to grin at him.

"Because we're friends." He looked at their intertwined hands before responding quietly, "Something like that." Now she was looking at their hands. He cleared his throat, returning his eyes to the ceiling.

"Anyways, I wouldn't be able to help if I wanted. I actually don't really deal with the Resistance at all. Hux thought it would be wise for me to focus on other things."

"What about when you came to Jakku?"

"Ah. Yes. Well. I had agreed with Hux, except that I wanted to be privy to anything regarding you." His face heated a little, but Rey moved on.

"Huh. So does any of this mean Hux is going to come after me specifically?"

"I'd say yes, he thinks you're the one who killed Snoke. Because of that, he's probably more interested in you than other Resistance members. But if he is the one who's using Carson, and he knows about our connection, he might also want to use you against me." That part really had Kylo worried. Usually, he could deal with Hux himself, but he was starting to understand that if Rey was involved, he might not have as much luck.

"Is he trying to get rid of you or something?" That made him laugh.

"Of course. Hux has always hated me, but he can't kill me. Not to mention if I was gone he would be Supreme Leader. So I'd say he's definitely trying to get rid of me. I wouldn't be surprised if he has a whole scheme in the works."

"You don't sound very worried about him then."

"I can take care of myself. But I would be worried if he tried to use you." Rey was quiet for a moment before saying, "I would be worried if someone tried to use you against me too." She let go of his hand and was suddenly laying against him, with her arms around his waist. He was just as surprised as he had been last night, but didn't hesitate to hug her back.

"What are we going to do then?"

"There's not much we can do. Just be prepared I guess, and watchful. Stay close to the people you trust, they'll keep you safe." She moved her head a little to look at him.

"Who's going to keep you safe?" He didn't really have an answer to the question. She seemed to understand that, so she continued.

"Does this mean we're working together now? We make a pretty good team."

"Yeah. We do." He unconsciously stroked her back with his hand as he thought, _ we would be unstoppable if you were by my side. _

"Can we go to sleep now?" He nodded, careful not to disrupt her head laying on his chest.

It wasn't long before they were both asleep.

* * *

Finn was deep in thought as he left dinner when he spotted a familiar-looking person slipping around the corner and down the hallway. His mind on overdrive, he ran back into the cafeteria.

"ROSE!" She and the entire room, looked up to see his frenzied expression. She dropped her fork, getting up without question and followed him out. He ran down the hallway, not bothering to explain. She would understand soon enough.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't a necessary note to read, but I wanted to include it. So read at your own leisure.  
Homophobia doesn't strike me as something that exists in the Star Wars universe. I especially feel that sexual orientation in their universe is a lot more complex with all the different species, and many times since writing this chapter I have wondered why I made it appear as though Poe was secretive or even a little embarrassed about who he would or would not be attracted to. Or why Kaydel would suggest Poe wouldn't be interested in Carson.  
As I've expanded on my version of Poe and his history, I think I am beginning to understand why I included that. Even if I didn't understand why at the time. I don't want to spoil anything so I'll stop there!  
Regardless, this is one of my favorite chapters and I hope you enjoyed it.  
As always thank you for reading!


	8. Learning

Finn turned into the hallway to see it empty. He thought for a moment before running towards the room he was staying in. Finding the door already unlocked, his suspicions were confirmed. He threw the door open to see DJ sitting on his bed. He heard Rose gasp behind him, then a click as her taser fizzed to life. He pulled his pistol from its holster at his hip and pointed it at DJ.

DJ's hands went up instantly but he looked unworried.

"Rr-relax F-finn."

"What are you doing here?" He barked.

"Give me one good reason I shouldn't shoot your head right off your neck." DJ had the decency to look surprised at Finn's violent suggestion but lowered his hands.

"I h-have information. About s-someone who has information ab-about you." Finn and Rose exchanged a glance before looking back at DJ.

"About Carson?" Asked Rose in surprise.

"Bl-londe guy? T-tall?" They nodded slowly, Finn's mind churning.

"Why the Force do you think we'll trust you again?" DJ made a disapproving click with his tongue.

"Guyss. I t-told you, it was j-just business." Rose snorted behind Finn who was struggling to keep his temper in check.

"Yes," Finn's words were sharp and icy as he continued, "Business. That killed hundreds of people. You practically destroyed the Resistance." DJ shook his head, "Ah. N-no guys. That would h-have happened without m-me. I j-just made a profit of it. That's wh-what war is kiddos. Bes-sides, you've d-done well! It l-looks like you h-have easily re-replaced them."

He was gripping his pistol so hard that several veins popped out. _ DJ should pay for what he's done. _ But Finn wasn't in charge, so DJ's fate wasn't his problem. 

"You know what, I don't think we should have to deal with this schmuck. I'll keep an eye on him and Rose could you go get Poe? Then we'll go on our way." Rose nodded and gave DJ one last scathing look before walking out, leaving him to Finn's currently enraged but usually capable hands.

* * *

Rose was struggling to find Poe. He hadn't been at dinner, and as she wandered through the halls, asking around, she was beginning to worry. Luckily she happened to pass Chelien, and he was able to help her identify Poe's location which happened to be the cafeteria.

"Iss ssomething wrong?" Chelien asked. Rose thought for a moment. She trusted Chelien explicitly, having worked with him many times, but felt it was a better idea to keep this on the down-low.

"No, I just had some questions I wanted to ask before the transition tomorrow." Chelien nodded and turned as if to leave but then spoke.

"Jusst be careful, all sssortss of emottions are coming off him right now." Rose wasn't surprised, Poe had a lot on his shoulders at the moment. And he was about to have more.

"Alright. Well, get a good nights sleep, Chelien. We have a lot of work to do tomorrow." Chelien once again nodded before turning and slithering away.

Rose continued on her way, practically running this time, heading towards the cafeteria. She entered in time to see Poe sitting down at an empty table. She made her way through the many tables and chairs, before coming to a stop in front of him. He looked deep in thought, and as evidence, his hair was even more unruly than usual, as if he'd continually ran his hands through it.

"Poe." He looked up in surprise, he obviously hadn't noticed her arrival, which worried Rose. Poe was usually pretty aware of what was going on around him.

"Yeah. Yes, Rose. What is it?" Rose hesitated before explaining. For a moment she thought Poe wasn't going to come and see DJ, but then he rubbed a hand over his face and got to his feet.

"Let's get this over with." He mumbled.

* * *

When they got to Finn's room, Rose opened the door to see DJ sitting against the wall with a bloody nose, while Finn was leaning on the opposite wall rubbing his hands. When they entered, Finn straightened up and said, "Finally!" He walked a little closer and harshly whispered, "I am so done with this guy! I gave him a bloody nose and he still wouldn't shut up." Before either of them could say anything, DJ interrupted.

"You d-didn't bring the g-girl." Rose and Poe looked to Finn in confusion.

"He's talking about Rey. He kept saying he knew all about her, but he wouldn't say anything else. So I tried to shut him up." He looked over at DJ, "It obviously didn't work." Poe looked between them, perplexed.

"I thought you said he had information about Carson." Rose tried to ignore the bad feeling she had and was about to respond when DJ interrupted again.

"I d-do. I h-have lots of information g-guys. J-just listen." And before anyone could say or do anything he launched into his story.

* * *

DJ's story came out in stuttered pieces, leaving Rose too shocked to even interrupt. He was just explaining how he came across Carson, but her worries were increasing rapidly. She knew that Rey's secret was about to be revealed and she didn't know how Finn and Poe would react, forcing her to stand by the door fidgeting uncomfortably.

* * *

Finn couldn't believe what he was hearing. When DJ had begun his tale, Finn had just wanted to punch him again because he was so fed up with the stuttering. But when DJ told them how he ran into Carson at a small cantina, he couldn't help but be pulled into the story.

Apparently, Carson had tried to influence everyone in the cantina, and it had worked, but not on DJ. When Poe interrupted to ask how, DJ just tapped his nose and continued on. When it became apparent to DJ that Carson was up to something, he went along with Carson's command and left the cantina. He then proceeded to sit outside, acting like a beggar (which Finn didn't think he had much difficulty doing) and waited for anything to happen. Poe, who had sat down at Finn's desk, once again interjected, asking why DJ was making such an effort. DJ actually answered this time, although it wasn't completely satisfying, saying, "Information p-pays." Eventually, he had noticed a woman enter the cantina with the signature spymaster's haircut. Rose interrupted here, "How did you recognize the haircut?" DJ chuckled.

"I-I've made my r-rounds R-rosie. Spymasters have f-found me useful in the p-past. Especially th-the women." He added with a wink. Finn and Rose exchanged a glance. _ Gross. _

DJ then apparently proceeded to hack into a camera that was hidden in the spymaster's suit. Anticipating their next question, he just said, "E-easy trick." This time it was Finn and Poe exchanging a glance. If it was some sort of tech, it would be useful to get their hands on it. Finn made a mental note to ask about it later.

"It w-was easy t-to access, those F-first Order cam's are high qualit-ty, b-but not well pro-protected." Finn straightened.

"First Order?"

"Y-yes. I will be g-getting to that F-finn." It wasn't until much later that he finally got to explain, because the next part of his story caused a bit of commotion.

He proceeded to report on what he had heard. Supposedly, Carson had abandoned his post, hoping to trade the information.

"Heh. The l-lady didn't like th-that. She t-tried to remind him th-that he was spying o-on s-some Rey person." Hearing this confirmed made Finn's stomach tighten.

"But he g-got to make the t-trade anyways be-because his information was on the Su-supreme Leader." Finn was not expecting that, and looking at Poe he knew he wasn't alone. When he glanced over at Rose however, her expression was unreadable, making Finn feel even more confused.

Then DJ dropped the bomb.

* * *

When DJ finished his story, Poe was so deep in thought that he barely noticed Finn rushing towards DJ, presumably to get in another punch. He shot up from his chair and managed to pull Finn back before he could inflict too much damage.

"Woah, buddy, you've got to stop trying to solve everything with your fists." Finn struggled for a moment before relenting.

"Sorry." He muttered. Poe patted him on the back, knowing that he really was sorry. He turned back towards DJ who was still huddled against the wall, attempting to get his thoughts in order.

"So, what are we going to do about this? I mean this is crazy and definitely false, right? Rey would have told us." Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Finn nodding in agreement and he looked to Rose to see if she had any thoughts.

Whatever reaction he had been expecting to see from Rose was completely absent. Instead, she was looking at DJ, her face guarded, and not at all conflicted or confused.

"Rose?" She looked at him.

"I, uh… I'm going to get Rey. I'll be right back." She turned and fled the room leaving a baffled Poe and Finn with a chuckling DJ.

"What is it?" Poe snapped. DJ wiped a tear from his cheek, still laughing.

"Sh-she already knows!" He clapped, "B-but your f-faces! You didn't d-doubt your friend f-for a moment." Poe was regretting stopping Finn because now he had the urge to give this man a black eye.

"Rey is on our side." Insisted Finn fiercely, "There is no way that anything you're telling us is true." DJ shook his head, clicking his tongue in disapproval.

"F-finn. Must I al-always teach you? You m-must learn th-this, yes? Everyone is-is b-bad. We are alls tr-traitor. Even y-you. You be-betrayed your people." Poe put his hand on Finn's shoulder, reminding him to stand down.

"It isn't the same." Finn growled. DJ shook his head again and looked towards the door.

"Isn't it?" He asked, tapping his nose. He got to his feet then, going to stand at the foot of the bed.

"N-now. I want t-to meet this g-girl. She sounds qu-quite int-interesting."

* * *

An insistent knock on the door woke Rey. She sat up quickly, looking for Ben, before realizing he wasn't there.

The knocking continued, prompting her to jump out of bed and whack the device on her wall. It glowed to life, telling her the time. _ It's only been a few hours. What's going on? _

She pulled her staff from the corner and crossed to the door, pulled it wide open.

Rose stood there, arm raised and prepared to knock again.

"We've got a problem. You might want to get your shoes."

* * *

On their short walk to Finn's room, Rose tried to fill Rey in.

"You remember Finn and I telling you about that codebreaker guy DJ?" When Rey didn't respond, she added, "Betrayed us to the First Order? Got a bunch of our friends killed?" Recognition dawned and Rey quickly nodded.

"Yeah, well he just showed up claiming to know stuff about Carson. Turns out he was working for the spymasters just as we suspected, and I'm pretty sure DJ said something about the First Order, but he didn't have time to explain-." Rose shook her head, refocusing.

"Anyways, the point is he knows about you and, uh, Kylo Ren. And he just told Finn and Poe." Rey stopped in surprise. She thought that they were going to track Carson down or something. She hadn't known this was about her.

Rey looked to Rose, "So—so they know?" Rose waved her forwards, urging her to continue walking. As she obeyed, Rose elaborated.

"Well, yes. They technically do, but I'm fairly certain they don't believe DJ. My leaving to get you may have added some credibility to DJ's story though."

"Okay. Okay, so they know. Or at least they kind of know. What am I going to do?" They were almost to Finn's room now.

Rose put her hand on Rey's arm.

"I'm sure it will be fine. Or something." _ That was reassuring. _

They came to a stop before Finn's door and Rey took a moment to nervously shake out her arms before knocking.

* * *

"Finally!" Finn stood aside to let Rey and Rose in. Rey and DJ took a moment to look each other up and down before Rey headed towards an empty corner of the room. The weird silence in the room was killing him.

"Did Rose tell you the crazy things this guy has been saying about you? I mean come on, it's absolutely nuts…" He trailed off when he saw Rey's face. She turned to the corner hiding her face as she fiddled with a piece on her staff. 

"I mean, it's definitely not true. You would have told us." Finn said confidently, looking to Rey for confirmation. Rey put her staff against the wall, exhaling loudly. She turned back towards them with a look on her face that Finn was already hating.

"It's, uh. It's true." The door closed with a sudden bang as if to emphasize her words in the quiet room. He looked to Poe and Rose, hoping for some help because he couldn't believe what he was hearing. His voice rose in desperation.

"What do you mean it's true?" Rey wouldn't look at him, cracking her knuckles as she responded.

"I'm connected to B-Kylo Ren. Through the Force." Finn seemed to be the only one struggling with this. He could already see the wheels turning in Poe's head, as he was probably trying to find a way to turn this into some sort of advantage.

"So you can talk to him or something?" Poe asked, beginning to pace back and forth.

"Uh yeah. It's basically like he's right here, like one of you. I can hear him, talk to him, touch him and-." Finn felt alarms going off in his mind.

"How do you know you can touch him?!" He practically shouted. DJ, who had been quiet up until now, began to cackle. When Rey didn't answer, Rose came and put an arm around him. He scoffed, _ as if that will make me feel better. _ Then he realized he did feel a little better. Calmer at least.

Meanwhile, Poe had begun to sprout out questions, not even giving Rey time to answer.

"How long has this been going on? Can you spy on him? And is it true? That he cares about you or something? Because DJ said that he came to help you when Carson attacked you. And he hasn't killed you yet," He stopped pacing for a moment, "Not that he would be able to kill you, just that he's probably had the chance. Which most likely means he does care about you somehow. Which is insane…" He continued pacing, "But Rey!" He sounded excited, "We can use this. We can use you against him! We could make a trap, or-" Rey cut him off, looking fierce.

"You will not use me against him." Finn wasn't the only one who was startled by her threatening tone. Poe had stopped midstep looking alarmed, while Rose's arm tightened on his back. Even DJ--who had laid back on the bed as if he was bored after Rey had entered--jolted upright in surprise.

Even more disturbing was the conclusion Finn quickly came to.

"You care about him! But he's a monster Rey, evil! You can't protect him!" DJ cut in, aiming a disappointed look at Finn.

"Wh-what did I j-just learn you?" When no one said anything he went on.

"We-we all are bad F-finn. Wh-what makes him s-so evil?"

"He's killed people! He's trying to take over the galaxy!" He looked to Rose and Poe for support, but neither of them had anything to say. They already understood what DJ was trying to explain to him.

"And you-you kill t-too."

"I don't go around killing people! Just the First Order!"

"Ah. But y-you once knew th-them. Were they re-really so e-evil? Are they s-so different fr-from you?" Finn felt stunned.

"Well, I mean, they-." He cut off when he realized he had nothing else to add. _ He's right. _

DJ looked closely at Finn, and whatever he saw must have satisfied him, because he laid back on the bed.

They were all quiet, the mood in the room transitioning from rigid to resigned. Poe sat on the ground and put his head in his hands.

"So, what now? I'm pretty sure Kylo Ren isn't siding with us, but he's not going to try to kill Rey right? Where does that leave us?" Rey was about to say something but yawned before she could start, causing Rose to yawn too, and Finn put his arm around her waist as she leaned against him tiredly.

Rey blinked a few times, attempting to keep herself awake before she finally spoke.

"I think we should just continue as we planned. I did talk to Ben--." Finn shot her a look.

"Uh, I did talk to Kylo, and he said it would make sense for General Hux to have hired the spymasters. I guess he wants to get rid of Kylo." Finn rolled his eyes and thought, _ don't we all. _ Rey sent him a glare as if she had read his mind. Which was entirely possible. 

"And, we figured that Hux might try to use me against Kylo, but we have no idea what kind of crazy plan he might have in place. He seems like a pretty smart guy, so we shouldn't underestimate him." Poe nodded, finally taking his head out of his hands. He looked extremely relieved--almost giddy--which Finn found strange considering the situation.

"Well, at least I won't have to talk to Tayo." He continued in an almost inaudible mumble, "Not that he responded." Poe suddenly received multiple questioning looks and the odd expression on his face was replaced with an upsetting amount of tiredness. He looked as though he held the weight of the world on his shoulders. _ Of course, he kind of does. _

"The spymaster I was talking about earlier. I just meant that it's one less thing to do since we're pretty sure we know who hired Carson."

Finn felt like laughing. So much needed to be explained, and yet, all he wanted to do was go to sleep. And looking at everyone's tired faces, he figured they felt the same. He was about to suggest that they go to bed and talk about this later when he realized something.

"What are we going to do about DJ?" The man in question lifted a hand, acknowledging Finn.

"Right, well I thought he would just stay the night in here." Poe said.

"You--what?" Poe raised an eyebrow at Finn.

"We'll just give him a blanket or something, and we'll figure it out tomorrow. For now, I'm going to bed." He stood up, causing Rose to lift her head.

"Yes, bed." Rose untangled herself from Finn and opened the door, waiting for Poe. He stood and clapped Finn on the shoulder.

"Goodnight guys." Rey and Finn waved at them as they left.

Rey turned to grab her staff, her movement causing DJ to sit up, chuckling once more.

"Wh-why you bring th-that?" Rey looked confused for a moment, possibly because DJ was finally speaking to her. She looked to Finn as if asking for permission to respond or something, _ as if I'm in charge of DJ. _ Finn took a moment to roll his eyes at the ceiling before nodding.

"Oh, well Rose woke me up and I wasn't sure what was happening, so I brought it just in case."

"S-smart girl. I j-just had one w-wondering." Rey immediately looked wary.

"Yeah?" DJ tapped his chin, looking thoughtful as if he was about to divulge some sort of fantastical story or advice. _ Which, come to think of it, he's already done. _

"Would y-you go with h-him now?" Finn had no clue what DJ was talking about but Rey certainly did. She opened her mouth, with a confident expression, but then stopped, looking confused. Just as confused as Finn and Poe had been for the past few hours. DJ nodded sagely.

"Hmm. Th-that's what I th-thought." Then he went into the bathroom leaving Finn and Rey alone.

Finn looked at Rey carefully, and hesitantly asked, "What did he mean?" Rey flexed her hands against her staff before she quietly answered.

"I don't know how much DJ told you, but before Crait? After Kylo killed Snoke, he asked me to join him."

"But you're here." She nodded. She hadn't joined him, instead, she left to save them. That confirmation restored his faith in Rey, and he knew that while he wanted a much lengthier explanation at some point, he would be satisfied for now.

"So, he killed Snoke?"

"He was supposed to kill me, but he turned on Snoke."

"Huh." Rey stepped towards him carefully, fingers jumping nervously on her staff.

"I know I kept this massive thing from you, but I'm still the same. And you're still my best friend. I don't want this to come between us." Finn grinned.

"It won't." He got closer, going in for a hug, her staff almost hitting him in the face.

"But what's going on between you guys anyways? Are you two in love or something?" Rey's face reddened suspiciously fast. Her, "Shut up.", came out muffled as she hid her face in his chest. Finn's smile faded as he rested his chin against her head, now seriously contemplating her relationship with the leader of the First Order. _ Nope. This is definitely not okay. _

Rey seemed obvious to his feelings and after a bit, she stepped back, smiling up at Finn.

"Goodnight." Rey's hand once again made its way to her staff as she opened the door. 

"Night." He responded, watching his best friend exit the room.

The bathroom door suddenly swung open, with an oddly refreshed-looking DJ stepping out.

"S-so, c-can I h-have the bed r-roomie?" Finn groaned.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has anyone else seen the Rise of Skywalker yet? I saw it on Thursday night with my family and I CANNOT stop thinking about it. But don't worry, there will be no spoilers from me! And even though I have tons of new ideas, this story's plot has been planned out for some time and I will not be changing it. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this somewhat eventful chapter! And as always, I love comments! ;P


	9. When It Rains

Gleaming boots clicked against the cold ground as an impeccably dressed officer made his way through the halls. Anyone he encountered snapped to attention, eyes on the ground until he passed them by. Only when they were sure he would not turn back did they allow themselves to watch his progression.

The massive ship had been on high alert the past few days as numerous high-ranking officials and powerful leaders arrived. The mood on board the ship was tense as soldiers muttered to each other, placing bets and making guesses as to what was coming next. There were whispers of a new mega-weapon, stronger and deadlier than Starkiller Base. Others believed they were finally going to make a move on the Resistance, as some of their comrades had already been sent to obscure locations, waiting for orders to arrive. The most common rumor, the one FN-8876 found herself thinking about most, was that this meeting had something to do with the missing Supreme Leader. There hadn't been much talk in the beginning, it being common for high-ranking officers to disappear for some time to attend to something top secret. But after two weeks he still hadn't been sighted. Then another two went by without any sign of him. No one dared to voice what they were thinking—that the power-hungry General Hux somehow got rid of him. And yet Hux hadn't tried to claim the title of Supreme Leader. That was six months ago.

Needless to say, the possibilities were endless, but the troops could all agree on one thing. They were bored and on edge, growing tired of being in the dark. They had been trained—no, programmed, to fight and yet they were doing nothing. At least that's how FN-8876 felt as she watched General Hux enter the massive meeting room, no seat unfilled as they awaited some important speech. Before she could hear or see anything else, the doors slide shut, issuing a small hiss as they locked.

FN-8876 felt that familiar tug that often got her into trouble, that had stopped her from getting her own command, that kept her from respecting her leaders and they her. The woman she had once been might have named the feeling resentment, but that word was no longer part of her vocabulary.

Years of training, killing and destruction had broken her former rebellious tendencies, and she had taken it upon herself to train as hard as she could and in every field possible. But no matter how well she performed, her past would not be erased and she would not be recognized for her skills. Nothing had changed for years, forcing her into this endless routine with no end in sight.

A group of troops passed by, and she was thrust back into the present, realizing she needed to continue on her way to the cafeteria. The promise of their evening meal doing nothing to alter her mood. And as she fell in line, waiting to receive her carefully rationed tray full of tasteless food, something in FN-8876 began to burn. It was barely a spark, but it was there, and it wasn't going away.

* * *

Hundreds of eyes followed General Hux as he made his way to the center of the room. Rows of hard metal seats encircled him, elevating as they advanced by rank, each seat designated for a certain person. He took satisfaction in seeing the lack of color in the room. The politicians and military leaders surrounding him knew there was no place for color in the First Order. Instead, they were made to wear uniforms in differing shades of gray, black, white and silver denoting their station. Hux smirked.  _ Less freedom, more control _ .

Standing straight and unmoving, hands clasped behind his back, Hux took a moment to look at the single empty seat across from him. Where the Supreme Leader should be. His absence was glaringly obvious in the otherwise packed room.  _ No matter. Begin.  _

"Unfortunately the Supreme Leader could not be with us today." A few people shifted in their seats. He continued on, his voice booming through the room, harsh and proud at the same time.

"Regardless, today we begin the process of ridding the universe of the so-called Resistance. Since the beginning of our glorious reign, these terrorists have plagued our righteous mission, the only thing in the way of total order and complete prosperity. But no longer!" Hux let his statement sink in for a moment. He could see the anticipation building in the eyes of many.

"You may have wondered why the Resistance has lasted this long." He scoffed then, the sound echoing through the otherwise quiet room.

"It is because we allowed it. So that we might have a target worthy of our newest and greatest weapon." Murmurs suddenly filled the room. Hux relished their surprise but needed to keep control.

"SILENCE." And it was so. He motioned to a woman in the first row and she stood, making her way towards him.

"This is Captain Terra, she will explain." Then he walked out.

Out of the meeting room, he allowed himself to grin.

The trap was set.

* * *

Rey woke with a gasp.  _ It was just a dream. _ Or at least that's what she told herself. If it was a vision, she didn't know what it was supposed to mean. What she was being warned about.

Instead of dwelling on it, she rose to change and began to pack her belongings. She was going with Chewie to Dantooine. They had been contacted about an apparent force-sensitive family there. And Rey knew that if they had been informed, the First Order had been too. Rey and Chewie had to get there as fast as they could, if only to warn the family.

She left her room and headed towards the cafeteria, stomach grumbling. On her way she ran into Finn who was carrying a bag as well and looked like he hadn't slept at all.

"Where's DJ?" Finn rubbed a hand over his face, groaning.

"You mean my 'roommate'? Poe came for him earlier, they should be in the cafeteria too." Rey nodded and they continued into the cafeteria. When they heard Poe's voice echoing through the room, Finn muttered, "We must be late." They slipped in silently to see Poe standing on a table, addressing the room.

"...some getting used to, but these changes are necessary. As long as you stick with your group leader and follow their instructions, you'll do fine. We won't be together again for a while, and I know it will be hard, but this is all for a purpose. We won't let the First Order win. And one day we will face them directly, but that day is not coming for some time. So keep your spirits up and may the force be with you!" Rey and Finn looked to each other grinning as the room thundered with applause.

"He sounds like a politician."

"That's kind of what he is. He's come a long way. We all have." Rey knew Finn was reliving their beginning as well. Remembering an epic chase through the sands on Jakku, running from rathtars on Han's freighter.

"Those were some great times." She remembered fondly. Before she could say anything else, little Clover appeared before her, grabbing her hand.

"Miss Rey! Why are you leaving us?!" Clover's distraught look hit Rey like a punch. She remembered asking herself the same thing over and over on Jakku. She couldn't find the words to explain anything to Clover. She was struggling with a response when Finn came to her rescue, kneeling down to speak to her.

"Miss Rey has an important mission that she has to go on, but she'll be back. And you'll be with Rose and Chelien. They'll be lots of fun right?" Clover nodded hesitantly, but still not convinced. Rey finally got herself together enough to add, "And Chelien will help continue your training! When we see each other again, you'll be a whole lot stronger. Right?" Clover nodded again, smiling this time. Clover gave Rey a hug as Finn got to his feet, then ran off, joining her friends who happened to be surrounding Rose.

Finn had a soft smile on his face as he watched Rose talking to the younglings and said, "There's someone I have to say goodbye to." He turned to grin at Rey one last time before going to Rose.

* * *

The next hour contained hundreds of goodbyes, hugs and some tears. By the time Rey, Chewie, and R2-D2 were situating themselves in their small shuttle, Rey was more than ready to go. She really loved all of her friends and students, but she had come to realize she much preferred smaller groups. Or complete solitude. Rey figured it was due to her life before the Resistance when she had been content to spend days on end in her own company.

"Well," she said, looking at the controls, "It's no Falcon." Chewie growled in agreement. She would take the Falcon over any ship, but for now, it was too recognizable. Because they hadn't been using it for some time, Maz had taken it and hidden it somewhere. Rey knew that Chewie missed it as much as she did, probably more so.

"I suppose we're ready then? Everything set R2?" He beeped in confirmation, and Rey looked to Chewie beside her, hands at the ready. She grinned, "Then let's go."

* * *

The rain was pouring into the streets of the busy city, soaking anyone in its path. Poe stood next to Finn, watching DJ wander off, a massive amount of distaste lingering. Shaking his head he said, "After all the goodbyes we had today, I'm not wasting any tears on this one." Finn grinned at him and added, "When it rains it pours." Poe shook his head once more, grinning this time as he asked, eyebrow raised, "What the Force are you talking about?" Finn held his stomach as he barked at Poe's mystified expression.

Still chuckling slightly, he said, "I have no idea. That's what Rose said when most of the younglings started crying earlier. I kind of thought it had something to do with tears. Lots of them." Poe couldn't keep the smirk off his face as he and Finn turned back, struggling to stay dry as they worked their way through the hurried crowd towards the hangar holding their ship.

It was an older shuttle, not in the best shape, but functional nevertheless. And… There was a figure leaning against it, arms crossed in a casual stance as if they had no care in the world. Poe fingered the blaster at his side, his face hardening in caution. He got closer, the person's features coming into focus.  _ Is that… _

"Tayo." His hands fell to his side in surprise. Tayo arched a dark eyebrow.

"Well, aren't you going to introduce me?" Poe stopped gaping for a moment, remembering Finn was standing next to him, looking very confused.

"Uh, yeah. Finn this is Tayo, he uh, he... Well, we knew each other. A long time ago." Tayo smirked at Finn, holding his hand out.

"I've heard a lot about you trooper boy, nice to finally be meeting you in person." Finn looked to Poe, unsure. But Poe was still gaping at Tayo, so Finn shook his hand.

"I can't say the same about you… Tayo." Tayo laughed nastily in response.

"Oh, I'm sure you've never heard of me." No one said anything after that, Tayo and Finn both watching Poe with different expressions. The whole situation began to get awkward enough to snap Poe out of his shock.

"Right. How've you been Tayo?" Again that harsh laugh.

"I doubt it matters." He turned to Finn suddenly, reaching for his belt. Poe and Finn both reacted quickly, grabbing for their blasters.

"Woah. Only grabbing some money boys. Calm down." Finn and Poe exchanged a glance as Tayo pulled out a couple of credits and held them in front of Finn. As he did, Poe noticed a small swirling tattoo claiming Tayo's finger. As if it were a wedding ring. He looked up to see Tayo watching him closely. His eyes held something Poe couldn't quite describe, something he couldn't understand. Tayo's eyes had always been unusually expressive. It used to help Poe read Tayo's moods. It wasn't helping now.

"Why don't you go get yourself something to eat, while I have a talk with flyboy." Finn ignored the money, turning to Poe instead.

"It's fine, I'll be right here. Stay out of dark alleys." He said attempting a joke. It fell flat and Finn gave Poe's shoulder a quick squeeze, an attempt at comfort before leaving. As he walked away he said, "I can buy my own food spyboy." Tayo smirked at that.

"So you have mentioned me. I like him." He commented, looking at Poe with a question in his eyes. Poe quickly responded, "It's not like that." Tayo nodded knowingly, dropping his credits back into his pocket.

"But you wish it was. Aren't you into deserter types?" He asked mockingly. Poe clenched his fists at his side and bit out the same response.

"It's not like that. And what are you doing here? What do you want?" Though his expression was easy, annoyance flashed through Tayo's dark eyes.

"You're the one who contacted me. I figured you really needed the help if you were desperate enough to turn to me." Poe felt like an idiot. He could barely think with Tayo standing here in front of him, didn't know how to go on with this conversation.

"Well?" Tayo folded his arms, waiting for Poe to say something. Anything.

"Right. Yes, well, I did need help, but-." Tayo waved a hand cutting him off.

"So you don't need my help?" Tayo snorted, shaking his head and started to leave. Poe didn't know what he was doing when he reached out and grabbed Tayo's arm, "Tayo wai-." Tayo yanked his arm out of Poe's grip.

"No Poe. I thought you were in danger, I thought something was seriously wrong. I wasn't going to abandon you if there was something I could do to help. But you don't need me anymore, so I'm going." Poe recoiled, the words hitting him right where Tayo intended. He could feel himself shrinking back into the boy he used to be. The boy who betrayed Tayo.

Tayo who was still standing in front of him, looking exactly like the deadly spy he had become, and nothing like the Tayo he remembered.

Tayo stepped closer, towering over Poe. Reminding Poe that he used to adore Tayo's height, it used to make him feel safe. Now he just felt threatened. As if Tayo knew what he was thinking, his face softened as he got even closer. Close enough that Poe could feel Tayo's breath on his face, the only warmth in the cold rain. Poe struggled to stand still as Tayo looked down at him. Pain barely hidden in his eyes.

"I didn't come here to hurt you or remind you, Poe. I just wanted to help. I know you're a different man—a better man than the one I knew." He lifted a hand, hesitating for a moment before pushing Poe's chin up, forcing Poe to look him in the eye.

"I'm proud of you. You've become the person I'd always hoped you would. And you're doing good things. Okay? Just do me one last favor and forget the past. Forget it, Poe. It will only hurt you." He fell silent and Poe watched in a daze as Tayo sucked in a breath, gently wiping a drop of rain from Poe's cheek, or maybe it was a tear. He was so numb he couldn't tell. He was cold and wet. But that's not what made him numb. His mind was frozen, leaving him absolutely nothing left to say. Tayo seemed to notice this, a real smile finally emerging. Poe could barely hear him when he softly whispered, "I can't believe I finally found a way to shut you up."

They were quiet for a moment. Tayo's hand hovering above Poe's lips, still holding his breath. Tayo finally let out a shuddering gasp, eyes searching Poe's for a moment before dropping his hand and stepping back. Poe had to stop himself from reaching out. From messing this up and ruining the underserved gift Tayo had just given him.

It was too soon, but within seconds, that arrogant, careless mask was back, leaving Tayo hidden under a spymaster's skin. He turned to go, carelessly throwing his last words over his shoulder.

"Never try to contact me again Poe. You don't want to know what'll happen if you do."

* * *

Finn only had eyes for his sandwich as he neared the hangar. But when he looked up, he nearly dropped it upon seeing Tayo standing right in Poe's face. Finn had absolutely no context for what was going on, but if he didn't know better, he'd think they were about to kiss. Eyes wide he searched for a place to hide, but unable to find one, he turned back in time to see the obvious anguish on Poe's face as Tayo disappeared.

He looked back at his sandwich for a moment, knowing it wasn't going to taste as good after whatever conversation he was about to have with Poe.

But when he finally arrived in front of Poe, a silent question on his face, Poe was just staring blankly into the space Tayo had disappeared into, tears running down his face.

In an almost ironic sounding tone, he finally commented, "I suppose when it rains it pours, right?"

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update took a while, but I've been busy with life and college applications.  
Let me know what you thought of the chapter!! And as always, thank you for reading! :)))


	10. Transition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? A new chapter? What?   
:DD

A loud beep echoed through the ship, alerting the passengers of their ETA. Rey, who had been thinking over her dream from earlier was glad for the distraction. She carefully reached out to poke a sleeping Chewie. At first, he didn't respond, but after a few more insistent jabs, he opened his mouth letting out both a yawn and a growl.

"We're arriving in ten." Rey informed him. Chewie growled back at her as he began to ready the ship for their exit from hyperspace.

"Well, at least you got some sleep, you shaggy creature." She muttered under her breath. Chewie took a moment to whack her in the arm, letting Rey know her comment hadn't gone unnoticed. She grinned as she too began flipping switches and feeding instructions into the ship.

"Should we go over the plan once more?" Chewie grunted in response, effectively communicating his thoughts.

"Fine." Rey knew they'd done stuff like this before, but she felt on edge and couldn't quite figure out why. She figured it was due to this being her first mission since they lost Leia. And everything with Ben and Carson and--. _ Okay, wow. I guess a lot has happened very quickly. That's probably why I feel like this then _ . Rey nodded to herself, _ that was definitely it. Nothing else. _

She was able to abandon that train of thought when they exited hyperspace and entered Dantooine's orbit. According to Poe, Dantooine used to be a rebel planet before they left to escape the Empire. Now it was just filled with people trying to live their lives without the interference of yet another galactic war.

Entering and exiting hyperspace was always jarring, but Rey never minded it when she got to see the planet she was about to land on. She could never tire of visiting new planets, and Dantooine was no different. It glowed various shades of green, promising a densely forested surface.

Rey practically beamed in approval as they broke out of orbit and began their descent to the planet. Green planets were always her favorites.

* * *

_ Okay, so maybe this planet isn't my favorite. _

Rey was weaving through the crowds of Dantoo Town, watching out for any more stormtroopers. She had taken care of most of them. She had to get back to Chewie, to warn him. _ Unless he already knows… _ With that thought she sped up, trying not to look too frantic as she shoved past hoards of people.

According to their tip, there had been two possible locations for the supposed force-sensitive family. Because of that, they split up, deciding the risk was worth it if they could save them. While it had seemed like a good idea at the time, Rey suspected the First Order had planned for them to make that decision. Easier to capture one person at a time.

Rey had reached her designated location with no problems when she began to feel apprehensive. The coordinates she had been given hadn't been for a house or any building, instead, they left her standing in the middle of an oddly empty street. She approached a vendor then, hoping to ask a few questions but was met with a frightened-looking man who wouldn't meet her eyes and mumbled in response to her questions. Standing there, it took her a surprising amount of time to realize this was a trap. People then began slipping from the alleys, all wearing clothes that were obviously too new and out of place for the town they were in.  _ Stormtroopers then? Maybe some special force or something. _ She tried to look nonchalant as she started back the way she came. Rey wished she had paid closer attention during her walk over, if they had been following her she should have noticed.

Quickening her steps, she tried to take in her surroundings, looking up just in time to see a sniper on the roof. The blast they issued came flying towards Rey, and for a moment she panicked. But only for a moment.

The stun blast stopped in mid-air, and she could see the fear in the sniper's eyes as everything and everyone around her seemed to freeze for a moment.

Rey knew from her research that force wielders couldn't usually stop stun blasts. They could, however, learn how to resist the effects, which is something Rey taught herself and had begun to teach her students. But apparently, Rey wouldn't have to worry about resisting, because she could now stop a stun blast. She felt a small smile on her mouth when she looked at the frozen blue ring wiggling and shaking inches away from her, and then she looked to the shocked faces around her. 

At that moment she felt powerful. Powerful and unstoppable.

So when they got over their shock, and the blasts started raining on her from above while the troopers came at her on the street--she didn't feel afraid--she felt completely focused, flinging stun blasts right back at the people above her. Once they were taken care of, she pulled her staff off her back and started in on the troops closest to her.

As she began to block and jab, Rey realized that she was going to be getting into more fights like this, and she was going to need a better weapon. Sure her staff was helpful, but with at least ten different people coming at her, she needed something with more impact.

She pushed those thoughts to the back of her mind and refocused on the fight. Doing her best to kick legs out, parry blows, and fend off random stun blasts. Whenever it finally seemed like she was getting somewhere, the troops she knocked out would just get back up again. With that realization, Rey knew she needed to end this, or else they would just keep going until she was too tired to fend them off.

It would only take a moment, so Rey took the risk and closed her eyes. She reached out, marking the individuals around her, and began to take them out. As they started to fall, she could feel their alarm growing which only added to her strength. Finding no one else to attack, she opened her eyes and took in the scene around her. At least fifteen bodies lay scattered around her. Looking around she could see a few people curiously watching from windows.

Rey knew she didn't have much time, so she turned quickly, avoiding eye contact with the vendors who watched her every step with wide and wary eyes.

She practically ran until she finally came upon the busier streets filled with all sorts of people and beings. Paying closer attention this time around, Rey pushed through the crowds, deciding to check and see if Chewie had returned to the ship.

But when she got to the small shipyard they had landed in, she knew he wasn't there. Rey stood there for a moment, feeling indecisive. She could return to the ship, warn R2 and possibly contact and warn her friends. Or she could leave for Chewie, who could have already been captured.

She made her choice, and with a last glance towards their ship where R2 waited, she took off, hoping she would reach Chewie in time.

* * *

Finn had probably looked over at Poe at least fifty times by now, and each time nothing had changed. Poe was just sitting in the pilot's seat, back straight, face hard and unreadable. It had been hours since they had run into Tayo.  _ Well, I wouldn't say run into. More like hours since we were tracked down by Tayo. _ Finn grinned at himself a little, but then sobered up again. Which basically described their entire trip so far.

Aside from a few quipped words as they boarded the ship, Poe hadn't really said anything, leaving Finn to his own thoughts. Obviously, he had no idea exactly what had happened between Poe and Tayo, but he could tell there was a history. Finn had gotten to know Poe really well in the past year, and he knew that Poe was always there to help. He gave great advice and was one of those people who you could tell anything. But in the past hour, alone with his thoughts, Finn came to realize that Poe never really talked about his own past. At all. Sure he shared random memories of Leia and other Resistance legends, but Finn had no idea what his life had been like. What experiences and challenges he had gone through that made him into the man he was today.

He supposed it didn't really bother him too much. It's not like Finn shared a ton about his past life,  _ not that there is much to share. _ He thought to himself. But he did wonder if there was more to Poe than any of them knew, than they could guess.

Suddenly there was a loud beep from the controls, causing Finn and Poe to look to the center of the console where the holoprojector was located. The pad beside it offered an incoming communication from a ship that Finn knew was Rey's. Poe quickly jabbed the accept button, and they watched as a hologram of Rey appeared.

Poe spoke first, "Rey, is something wrong?" Her image blurred a little as she shook her head.

"Not at the moment. But I wanted to let you know, Dantooine was a trap." Poe and Finn looked at each other in alarm before turning back to Rey.

"It was a trap?"

"Yeah. First Order. Chewie and I are fine though. But I do think we need to figure out which source that intel came from. They could be working with the First Order and I don't want to send anyone else into trouble."

"Alright. I'll let the others know and we'll look into it. What are you going to do now?"

"I have some other leads to follow, but I need to visit Maz first." Finn raised an eyebrow.

"What for?"

"You'll see soon enough." Finn and Poe once again traded looks, both knowing this was all Rey would tell them.

"How'd it go for you guys?" Finn waited for Poe to answer, but when he didn't say anything Finn spoke.

"Good. Everything should be taken care of." Rey nodded as he continued, "We're on our way to meet with some dealers now. We're actually almost there."

"Alright, I’ll let you guys go then. Meeting tonight?" They both nodded, then Finn went to switch off the holoprojector as Rey waved in farewell.

Finn tapped his leg impatiently as he asked, "So do we know who the contact was?" Poe shook his head.

"I'm not sure exactly who it was, but I know they're not one of ours. Someone recommended them to us, I just can't remember who." At his last words, they both looked at each other in alarm.

"You don't think it was one of Carson's contacts?" Poe furrowed his brow.

"It's possible. We'll definitely have to look into this. But I don't think we should let too many people know about this." Finn took a moment to understand what Poe was implying.

"Oh." Poe nodded grimly.

"Just in case there's another spy."

* * *

It wasn't hard to find Maz. Rey just had to follow the sounds of laughter and the loud storytelling coming from the back of the cantina. She turned the corner to find Maz standing on a table, arms spread as she regaled her listeners with some story about an epic podrace on Tatooine.

"And just like that, the little slave boy—." She stopped suddenly, seeing Rey. The table grew quiet as Maz adjusted her goggles, looking closely at Rey.

"It's time isn't it?" Rey didn't bother wondering how Maz knew what she was there for, she just followed Maz as she hopped off the table leaving her crowd behind shouting objections.

It felt like hours as Maz brought Rey through corridors, up and down many staircases, until they ended up in front of a silver door in a dark hallway.

"Where are we?" Maz shook her head impatiently.

"It matters not. You will have all the time you need." Rey nodded and turned back to face the door.

"How do I open it?" Hearing no answer, Rey looked back and felt her eyes widen in surprise when she realized Maz had disappeared.

"Typical." She muttered. Rey stepped forward, looking for some sort of button to press or knob to turn but there was nothing. Suddenly the door flung open, urging Rey to step into the dark room that waited. She stepped forward tentatively, not able to see into the room.

The door closed as abruptly as it opened, leaving Rey in the dark room with her hand twitching at her side. Without warning the room flooded with a bright light, forcing Rey to close her eyes.

* * *

Kylo entered the command chamber, looking to Commander Hento who stood in front of a computer. The others in the room grew stiff as they watched their Commander turn to report.

"What's happened, Commander?" The man looked uncomfortable as he struggled with a response.

"Well, uh sir, we're not sure how it happened but-."

"Spit it out man."

"Yes sir, of course, sir. Somehow a group of six infiltrated your chambers and-." Kylo cut him off with a wave of his hand and turned to leave the room. He didn't need to know anything more.

The Knights of Ren were here.

* * *

Approaching his chambers, Kylo felt curious and not much else. It had been quite some time since he had seen them, and once he became Supreme Leader, he had anticipated their arrival. When months went by without any sign of them, they drifted from his mind and he focused upon other things in their wake. So when he entered his room and was faced with six figures in masks, he was only wondering,  _ why now?  _

Kylo was sure the Knights had picked their positions carefully with the intent of looking threatening, but for whatever reason, it had the opposite effect on him. He clenched his teeth together, stopping himself from smirking as he stepped further into the room.

"Something amusing to you?"  _ Ah. Yes. _ Kylo had forgotten the Knights could sense his emotions. Other than Rey, he was rarely around other force-sensitive beings.

Opting not to respond, Kylo stayed quiet, waiting for one of them to speak first. He looked to his left then, to Sydney Ren who sat on his bed. She was the youngest of the group and had always been Kylo's favorite. She was unusually talkative and often couldn't go for too long without speaking. He was hoping she would say something, and she was obviously about to when Namber shook her head. 

Namber stood beside the bed, clearly there to keep Sydney in check. Since the beginning, they had been inseparable. Two halves of a whole, Sydney was impulsive and verbal, while Namber was deliberate and vigilant. The combination made them deadly, something Kylo used to envy.

"I see you're no longer wearing your mask." Kylo turned his head slowly to look at Kellen. He stood against the wall, arms crossed as he waited for Kylo's response. Kylo himself was waiting for a response. He used to be just as impulsive as Sydney when it came to responding to Kellen's taunts. Just hearing Kellen's voice would make his blood boil, but for whatever reason, the only feeling Kellen issued was the same faint amusement he felt upon entering the room.

"I'm sure that's not the only thing that has changed since we last met." Kylo finally responded. Kellen nodded.

"Of course. There is the matter of… Snoke." Sydney suddenly jumped off the bed, as if she couldn't contain herself any longer.

"Are we supposed to bow to you now?" 

Kylo raised an eyebrow at Kellen, "Only some of you." Kellen laughed then, the sound distorted through his mask as he mockingly bowed. Raj, who stood beside him joined in, ever the comedic of the group. Kylo waved them off, trying to look annoyed.

"Enough of this foolishness. I assume you want something?" Zardos didn't look up from the tablet he was messing with when he said, "We just wanted to check in. You know, see where we stand amidst all this…" He finally looked up, waving his hand around in emphasis, "Amidst all this Supreme Leaderness."

"You want clarification of our relationship?" If that is what they wanted, Kylo didn't really have any sort of answer for them. Raj nodded, "I suppose you could put it that way, yes." Kylo clasped his hands behind his back as he tried to put together some sort of response. He didn't really need the Knights of Ren anymore, and he knew they had their own agenda.

"I won't try to claim any sort of mastership over you if that is what you're wondering. And I won't affiliate you with the First Order as Snoke tried to." Fantar finally spoke up from the corner of the room.

"It sounds like you're freeing us young Kylo." Kylo once again raised an eyebrow. The Knights were all around the same age, but once Fantar found out he was the oldest--though it was only by a few months--he had started acting as if he were ancient and took to calling everyone young or child.

"I suppose I am. I only ask that we remain allies. As we were before." He didn't add it but knew everyone was thinking it.  _ Before Snoke _ . The room grew quiet, as they likely were all reliving moments of the past.

Before Snoke had claimed Kylo as his own, he and the others had banded together. Being the strongest of Luke's students, they used to make plans for their future. Plans to bring peace and safety to the galaxy. And somehow, throughout their adventures and escapades, Kylo had become their leader.

So once Snoke claimed Kylo and changed his name, Snoke created the Knights of Ren. A powerful group of masked unknowns led by Kylo. They followed out orders from his Supreme Leader and aided the First Order. But as time went on, Snoke slowly began to divide Kylo from his Knights. They soon became so separate that Kylo would go months without hearing from or about them.

Fantar stepped forward then, holding out a hand for Kylo to shake.

"Allies then." He looked to the others for a moment, wondering if they felt the same way. Surprisingly Kellen had nothing to say, so when Sydney nodded at him, Kylo reached out and shook Fantar's hand.

* * *

Rose refused to feel worried as she shut off her wrist comm. She knew Rey and Chewie could take care of themselves, and if the First Order didn't come after anyone else, they would have confirmation that someone was after Rey as they had worried. Rose was just glad that Finn and Poe knew about Kylo Ren now. It got all of their information out there, so they could work better together.

She took a deep breath before turning out of the small closet she had found when Finn had first contacted her. Entering the main cabin of the transport ship Rose had to smile. The younglings lay sleeping scattered about, surrounded by blankets and pillows. She carefully made her way past them and into the cockpit where Chelien and their pilot Jessie sat talking quietly. They both looked back at her when she sat down.

"Everything okay?" Jessie asked carefully. Rose nodded.

"Finn was just checking in. How close are we?" Jessie tapped a screen to her side and they watched as their arrival time flickered up.

"A few more hours then. Are the little ones still sleeping?" Rose nodded again.

"Oh," Jessie began, "Sarah and Naja contacted us, they'll meet us there." Rose was glad, Sarah and Naja were some of her favorite people. They often worked together as Sarah and Naja were part of the team who found new recruits. Jessie seemed like she wanted to say more, but was hesitant.

"What is it?" Jessie cracked her knuckles, not saying anything so Chelien responded for her.

"They're bringing new little onesss." Rose was excited for a moment but remembered Jessie's reluctance to answer and felt alarmed when Chelien and Jessie exchanged a glance.

"Seriously guys. What is it?"

"They uh, they barely got to them in time. It wasn't a planned extraction." Rose put a hand to her mouth as all sorts of scenarios swirled in her mind.

"Simon and Jen—the younglings, they had to watch their parents and siblings burn to death. Their whole company actually." Watching Jessie's face, Rose knew she was going to have to sit down. The floor was cold and hard, but there was no seat for her. And so, after a moment, Jessie and Chelien continued, taking turns to explain what happened.

Sarah and Naja had been on the smaller Core World, Plexis, when they got word of a fight on the outskirts of town. A townie had become upset with a purchase they made with some traveling merchants. They took some friends with them to confront the merchant. The fight turned ugly fast as the townies began to burn down the merchant's tents and supplies. By the time Sarah and Naja got there, they only found two survivors, Simon and Jen.

Being a First Order occupied planet, they knew it was only a matter of time before stormtroopers showed up to deal out punishment. Simon and Jen, however, refused to leave, forcing Naja to stun them. They brought them to their ship and left the planet immediately.

"So they're on their way?" Rose asked after a moment.

"They had to make a ssstop firssst. But we will ssseee them sssoon." Rose nodded then, deep in thought. They had dealt with situations like this before, but it still hit Rose hard every time. According to Chelien, Simon was already on his way to adulthood, while Jen had been the youngest of the family. Only five years old.

Rose sat there for a little while longer before she finally got up.

"I, uh, I suppose it's probably time for meals. I'll wake up the younglings." Jessie nodded and Chelien stood, slithering out of the cockpit behind Rose.

Expecting to see the younglings still sleeping, Rose was surprised when most of them were up and sitting in a small group. They looked up at Rose with wide eyes. Before she could say anything they started spouting excuses.

"Jak woke me up!"

"Clover was spying and she told us, but we told her not too!"

"You didn't say we had to sleep!"

"Guys!" When they kept going, Rose raised her voice.

"GUYS!" That finally quieted them, and they looked up at Rose, some with innocent expressions, others looking impertinent.

"You're not in trouble. I just wanted to know what you were doing." No one said anything, so Rose looked to Jak, the oldest and usually the most responsible. He squirmed under her scrutiny and finally broke.

"We just heard you guys talking and when we heard about the new ones we were just talking about what we could do and-." Rose held up a hand to stop him.

"You were talking about what you could do? Like to help?" Clover jumped up then, always ready to talk.

"Yeah! We've all been together for a while, and we didn't want them to be sad. We were coming up with ideas." They nodded earnestly and Rose looked to Chelien seeing the same proud look in his eyes. She felt a little choked up as she proceeded to sit down with them and said, "Alright, tell me what you've got so far."

* * *

FN-8876 froze in the training room as an alarm sounded prompting her and the others in the room to look at the screen at the front of the room. She withheld her groan, instead, standing at attention as commanded. She and her fellow comrades watched, completely still, as one of the hourly messages from the First Order played on the screen.

It began as it always did, with the First Order's goals. Due to the hour, FN-8876 already knew what message they would continue with. She tried to zone out, tried not to pay attention, but that one part was coming. The one part that had never failed to bother her.

"You have chosen to be a part of this campaign, you have chosen to fight for what you believe in." It went on for a few more minutes then, but FN-8876 couldn't get past it as usual. It had only been a few weeks ago when those words had registered with her. When she realized that she hadn't chosen this fight. Or at least she couldn't remember choosing it. She wasn't sure if that was how anyone else felt, but she didn't dare ask. Didn't dare bring any attention to herself. She couldn't risk getting in trouble again.

And so she stood there, doing nothing until the message ended. Then went back to her training like everyone else.

* * *

Rey woke suddenly, hand going to wipe the drool off the corner of her mouth.

That had been the second time she had dreamed of this stormtrooper, and she didn't know what to do with it. She had finally admitted to herself what she had refused to before, that these were visions. But what they meant, she didn't know. The first time she thought it could have been a warning, of that weapon Hux had announced and the apparent trap. But this time she had only seen a small bit of the stormtrooper's life. And nothing from Hux. Or anything more about Ben missing.

A loud growl came from beside her.

"I definitely do not snore." Chewie let out a rumbling laugh.

"Shut up." Rey said playfully. She knew she snored, but not as much as Chewie. Sometimes she wished she had earplugs that could block out the loud sounds he made when he was sleeping.

The ship beeped, telling them to take over the ship. She and Chewie readied the ship to land, then waited until they felt the telling thump that announced their arrival. As they walked off, Rey patted the lump in her bag, grinning as she imagined her friend's faces.

* * *

Kylo dropped his fork in surprise. Raj looked up quickly.

"What is it?" Kylo struggled to keep his eyes on Raj.

"Nothing, I just uh… Remembered something." The rest of the Knights looked at him suspiciously but went on with their meals. When he was sure his emotions wouldn't give him away, he finally looked to Rey who stood there smiling beside the table.

" _ What is it? _ " She didn't say anything, but he knew she heard him. He could tell she was concentrating on someone else, but she was the one who had connected them.

" _ Is something wrong? _ " Once again she didn't answer, and despite her smiles, he was growing alarmed. Kylo wished she would just look at him for a moment.

But then she reached into a bag at her side and all thoughts flew from his mind.

Rey finally looked right at him and grinned as she activated her lightsaber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been forever guys! I don't have a Tumblr cause it's too confusing for me, (;PP) but you can come stalk me (and maybe even say hi!) on my terrible art account on Instagram (@ajellysquid)!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! All comments and thoughts are welcome, especially as at this time, I'm the only one editing this story, so there may be (definitely are) mistakes that I miss!


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